Monday, January 14, 2013

New Years

I was a bit late on the Christmas post, so here's a nearly equally late post about New Years.

New Years: On the whole this holiday is kind of lame from pretty much all fronts.  Let's start with . . .

The Time Perspective: As somebody once said, "time keeps on slippin', slippin', slippin' into the future. [1]  Also it's been noted that time doesn't have a start or an end, it just keeps right on going.  Nevertheless, we [2] arbitrarily picked a day to mark as the end/beginning of the period of time it takes the Earth to orbit the sun.  Then we made it into a party.  We could have just as easily picked March 13 or September 25. [3]

I realize that it probably had something to do with the symbolism of winter representing dying and the end.  Combined with the birth of the new year with spring, but if that was really what we aiming for then January should have started on the first day of Spring. [4]

The Holiday Perspective: We just had Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanza/Festivus. It's only been one week!  We realistically can only celebrate so many holidays in a year and the winter has so many of them.  Look at August.  There's nothing.  I'm just saying.

The Celebration Perspective:  And how do we "celebrate" the new year anyway?  Did you do anything, anything at all that actually had any relevance to a 'new year'?

Granted some of you may have made a resolution, but what does that have to do with a new year?  I mean I get it, new year, new chances, new choices.  Or rather that's what it's supposed to be.  Instead it's more like, new year, new chances, same old behavior. [5]

For most the holiday was an excuse to drink to much and wake up in a fog wondering what happened. [6] Of course, that's probably the real point of the holiday anyway.  New Years is like Christmas' drunk step-father.

And the reality of it is that most people are not looking forward to or actually celebrating on New Years at all.  Everyone gets together on New Years Eve.  They party it up and then once midnight hits, Jenny McCarthy kisses some random stranger and we all go home.  The arrival of the supposed point of the celebration is actually the signal of its end.  Seriously when you were anticipating whatever fun you were anticipating for the holiday, I'm willing to bet that what you were thinking of was stuff that you did on New Years Eve and not on New Years Day.

How most people really "celebrated" actual New Years Day was they watched some football and watched a parade.  Which might have actually been exciting if you hadn't just finished watching parades on Thanksgiving and Christmas.

New Years: D

[1] - No, it was not Seal.
[2] - Meaning Humans.
[3] - Except then of course those days would have been January 1st, but whatever.
[4] - a.k.a. March 20th
[5] - Be truthful now.  As I write this it's January 14th.  How many of you who made them are still following your resolutions?
[6] - And thus no different from any other weekend, except that it could actually be Tuesday.

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