tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-40032253919322150872024-03-13T06:58:28.379-04:00Mister B GradesMr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.comBlogger152125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-35632531345522939162023-10-03T18:09:00.001-04:002023-10-03T20:09:56.164-04:00Rating Stephen King's BibliographyI gave this a shot once before. [1] But I'm giving it another go. Albeit in a shorter per item format that's different from my usual set-up.<br />
<br />
I'm going to have short, one or two line reviews of everything thing the King has ever done. Adding new things as I read them.<br />
<br />
As previously noted elsewhere, I started working my way through King's canon late in 2016.<br />
<br />
<b><u>1974</u></b><br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b>Carrie: </b>Telekinetic girl gets teased until she snaps and runs rampant. Simply amazing. To think this is a first book makes it even more so. It's tense in all the right places. Read this one multiple times.<br />
<br />
Carrie: A<br />
<br />
<u><b>1975</b></u><br />
<br />
<b>Salem's Lot: </b>Vampires invade small town. Things go poorly for the town. Great ensemble cast. Fantastic writing really fleshing out the town. Classic vampire story from classic King.<br />
<br />
Salem's Lot: A<br />
<br />
<b><u>1977</u></b><br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b>The Shining:</b> Alcoholic plus family locked for winter in haunted hotel in the mountains. Creepy as all get out. Alcoholic changes which side he's on. Danny in the playground is downright terrifying.<br />
<b><br /></b>
The Shining: A<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Rage: </b>The first Bachman book. Insane teenager takes high school hostage. Lots of explaining. Sort of a Catcher in the Rye but Holden goes off the deep end. Not so great.<br />
<br />
Rage: C+ [2]<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b><u>1978</u></b><br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b>The Stand: </b>Plague kills most of world. Good and evil battle it out using the people left alive. Really long, but worth it. The beginning is amazing. The end is amazing. Some of the middle's a bit long.<br />
<b><br /></b>
The Stand: A-<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Night Shift: </b>King's first collection of short stories. Some of them are insanely good. A few not so much. Highlights: Last Rung on the Ladder, Man Who Loved Flowers, One For the Road, etc, etc.<br />
<br />
Night Shift: B+<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b><u>1979</u></b><br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b>The Long Walk: </b>Second Bachman Book. Kids walk in a competition where stopping means death. Twisted and yet believable. You'd think it would plod along, but it avoids that pretty well.<br />
<br />
The Long Walk: A<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>The Dead Zone: </b>Smith can see future. Reluctantly uses power to save lives and stop killer. Realizes he's got to stop a megalomaniacal politician from destroying world, but at what cost?<br />
<br />
The Dead Zone: A<br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b><u>1980</u></b><br />
<br />
<b>Firestarter: </b>Test experiments on Mom and Dad lead to girl who can start fires. Government agency tries to capture and control her. Not too smart. Starts to drag in the motives. A sentimental favorite.<br />
<br />
Firestarter: B-<br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b><u>1981</u></b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Roadwork: </b>Bachman number 3. Man despairs over progress. Ruins his own life to spite the world. Takes about as long to read this as it would to pave a road a road by hand. Spend your time on the road.<br />
<br />
Roadwork: F<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Cujo: </b>Series of bad choices and dumb luck allows a rabid Saint Bernard to trap a woman and child in a broken car. Also somehow a commentary on women who feel/are trapped in their lives.<br />
<br />
Cujo: B+<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Danse Macabre: </b>Non-fiction. King's commentary on horror in movies, radio, books and the like. I really need to read the updated version. Good insight from someone who knows the field well.<br />
<br />
Danse Macabre: B<br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b><u>1982</u></b><br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b>The Running Man: </b>Bachman number 4. Man living in dystopia signs up for game show where he is hunted. Great idea. Well done in parts. The ending isn't great. The hero isn't so heroic.<br />
<br />
The Running Man: B-<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>The Dark Tower: The Gunslinger: </b>Roland begins his journey to stop the Man in Black. More like a series of vignettes than a continuous story. Didn't really like the first time I read it. I was wrong.<br />
<br />
The Dark Tower: The Gunslinger: A-<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Different Seasons: </b>Four novellas in one book. They are:<br />
<br />
<u>Rita Hayworth and the Shawshank Redemption</u>: Innocent man ends up in prison. Survives until he can escape. Amazing. 'nuff said.<br />
<br />
Rita Hayworth and the Shawshank Redemption: A+<br />
<br />
<u>Apt Pupil</u>: Boy discovers Nazi lives nearby. Forces Nazi to tell tales. Both become twisted by it. My memory of this was worse than the read. Well written, but not something I will seek out again.<br />
<br />
Apt Pupil: B-<br />
<br />
<u>The Body</u>: The novel that inspire the movie Stand By Me. Boys set out to see a dead body. Their experiences along the way shape them more than they could have expected.<br />
<br />
The Body: A-<br />
<b><br /></b>
<u>The Breathing Method:</u> Tales told in a gentlemen's club about a woman who gives birth even though she's essentially dead. More of a long short story, but well worth the read.<br />
<br />
The Breathing Method: A<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Creepshow: </b>A comic book collection of the stories that were made into the movie by the same name. The stories are pulpy horror that succeed in being exactly what they aim to be an homage to the type of horror comics King read growing up. But that doesn't make them necessarily all that good.<br />
<br />
Creepshow: C-<br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b><u>1983</u></b><br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b>Christine: </b>Boy loves car. Boy loves girl. Car comes alive. Lots of people die. But it takes a long [reading] time to travel the distance and the journey's kind of boring at times.<br />
<br />
Christine: C+<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Pet Semetary: </b>Indian burial ground brings things back from the dead. Doesn't work great with the cat. What could go wrong if we do it to the toddler? Lots. A few dead spots but overall great.<br />
<br />
Pet Semetary: A-<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Cycle of the Werewolf: </b>Quick story told over the course of 12 monthly installments about a werewolf coming to town. Too short to have bad parts. Good enough you wish there was more.<br />
<br />
Cycle of the Werewolf: B-<br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b><u>1984</u></b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>The Talisman (Co-wrote with Peter Straub): </b>Boy travels the country to save his mother and a world connected to our own. Evil twins in both worlds try to stop him. Co-written with Peter Straub.<br />
<br />
The Talisman: A-<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Thinner: </b>Bachman book 5. Gypsy curses fat man to slowly wither away to nothing. Can he resolve things before he fades away? The ending seams cheap after the journey.<br />
<br />
Thinner: A<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>The Bachman Books: </b>A collection of the first four Bachman books. Look above for their individual grades. (Rage, The Long Walk, Roadwork, Running Man)<br />
<br />
<b>Skeleton Crew: </b>Kings second collection of short stories. Overall not as good as Night Shift, but still plenty of amazingly good stuff in here. Highlights include: The Mist, Mrs. Todd's Shortcut, The Jaunt, The Raft, Word Processor of the Gods, Survivor Type.<br />
<br />
Skeleton Crew: B (fwiw, The Mist and Mrs. Todd's Shortcut are A+)<br />
<br />
<b><u>1986</u></b><br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b>It: </b>A book about Pennywise the killer clown killing off kids in Derry Maine. Only Pennywise isn't really a clown (and for that matter isn't really named Pennywise). Also, the book is really about a group of misfit kids coming to terms with the reality of growing up and dealing with their own problems. Any way you want to call it, this is a great book.<br />
<br />
It: A+<br />
<br />
<b><u>1987</u></b><br />
<br />
<b>The Dark Tower: The Drawing of the Three: </b>Second book in the Dark Tower series. Roland gathers a group of three people to join him on his quest. The book starts out rough for Roland and only gets worse.<br />
<br />
The Dark Tower: The Drawing of the Three: A<br />
<br />
<b>Misery: </b>Annie Wilkes is Paul Sheldon's number one fan. She's also crazy and has him trapped in her house. A page turner from jump this is probably my favorite King book of all time.<br />
<br />
Misery: A++<br />
<br />
<b>The Tommyknockers: </b>Bobbi Anderson finds a buried UFO. The more of it that gets uncovered the better the aliens inside can control the nearby townsfolk. Sounds like a great premise but this book becomes a serious slog.<br />
<br />
The Tommyknockers: C<br />
<br />
<b><u>1988</u></b><br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b>Bare Bones - Conversations on Terror: </b>A collection of interviews with King from a variety of magazines and other places. If you are into King they are interesting enough, but I suspect most people would probably get tired of them long before they finish the book.<br />
<br />
Bare Bones - Conversations on Terror: B-<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Nightmares in the Sky:</b> Non-fiction collection of photographs of gargoyles taken by f-stop Fitzgerald. King writes the long introduction. Not something you need to read, but interesting enough. Not going to give this one a grade.<br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b><u>1989</u></b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>The Dark Half: </b>What if the pseudonym you wrote under became it's own separate entity. What if it was trying to kill you? Dark and grim story about just that. King exercises his Bachman demons?<br />
<br />
The Dark Half: B+<br />
<br />
<b><u>1990</u></b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>The Stand: </b>Reviewed above (under 1978), but 1990 was when the uncut version was released.<br />
<br />
<b>Four Past Midnight: </b>Another collection of four novellas. I'm reading this one right now. Or at least I was when I wrote this. They are:<br />
<br />
<u>The Langoliers</u>: An airplane slips through a crack in reality. Can the survivors get back to the real world?<br />
<br />
The Langoliers: B-<br />
<br />
<u>Secret Window, Secret Garden</u>: Maine Author gets accused of plagiarism by a strange man from Mississippi. The truth of what is going on is thinly veiled and easily guessed. The ending takes a ninety degree turn that both almost saves and almost ruins the story.<br />
<br />
Secret Window, Secret Garden: C+<br />
<br />
<u>The Library Policeman</u>: Don't forget to turn in your overdue books or the Library Policeman might have to come and get you. <div><br /></div><div>The Library Policeman: B<br /><div><br /></div><div><b><u>1991</u></b><br />
<br /><b>The Dark Tower III: The Waste Lands:</b> Roland, Susannah and Eddie are together, but they still need Jake. Once they get Jake, they lose Jake. They get Jake again and now a train is trying to kill Jake (and everyone else as well.)</div><div><br /></div><div>The Dark Tower: The Waste Lands: A</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Needful Things:</b> Curiousity shop opens in a small town. The proprietor is an agent of evil who sells the town just what it needs. The only cost is your soul.</div><div><br /></div><div>Needful Things: A</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>1992</u></b></div><div><br /></div><div><b>Gerald's Game:</b> Woman ends up handcuffed to a bed, without nobody around for miles to hear her.</div><div><br /></div><div>Gerald's Game: A+</div><div><u><br /></u></div><div><b>Dolores Claiborne:</b> Set as a long narrative by a woman who's tired of hiding her secrets, like what did happen to her husband?</div><div><br /></div><div>Dolores Claiborne: A<br /><br /><b><u>1993</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>Nightmares & Dreamscapes:</b> 24 more short stories from King. Highlights include: The End of the Whole Mess, The Night Flier, and Sorry, Right Number, plus more.</div><div><br /></div><div>Nightmares & Dreamscapes: B+</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>1994</u></b></div><div><br /></div><div><b>Insomnia: </b>Question: What happens when you don't sleep for a long time. Answer: You start seeing things. But maybe the things you are seeing are real and maybe seeing them will give you the knowledge to save important people.</div><div><br /></div><div>Insomnia: B-<br /><br /><b>Mid-life Confidential: The Rock Bottom Remainders Tour America with Three Chords and an Attitude: </b>True stories about what happens when several people with a lot of talent in writing decide to take their much smaller amount of talent as a band on the road.</div><div><br /></div><div>Mid-life Confidential: B-<br /><br />
<b><u>1995</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>Rose Madder: </b>Woman gets away from her psychotic husband and tries to live a new life. Too bad for her , the psycho husband is a cop who can track her down. Too bad for him she's not the timid mouse she used to be.</div><div><br /></div><div>Rose Madder: A-</div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b><u>1996</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>The Green Mile: </b>A tale about the guards and convicts on death row. Including one who has a magical power to heal. </div><div><br /></div><div>The Green Mile: A</div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><span style="font-weight: bold;">Desperation:</span> What if you been arrested by a cop from a very small town in Arizona? What if he is actually being possessed by an ancient evil? Also what happens when an author and his pseudonym write books at the same time?</div><div><br /></div><div>Desperation: B+</div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>Regulators (Written as Richard Bachman):</b> What happens when the characters from a kids TV show come to life and start killing everyone on the block? Also what happens when an author and his pseudonym write books at the same time?</div><div><br /></div><div>Regulators: B-</div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b><u>1997</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>The Dark Tower IV: Wizard and Glass: </b>Two stories told at the same time. In the present Roland and the others continue their travels. In the past, we learn of Roland's adventures as a new gunslinger and the discovery of a plot to aid the enemy.</div><div><br /></div><div>The Dark Tower: Wizard and Glass: A</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>1998</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>Bag of Bones: </b>A writer moves into his cabin by the lake only to find it is haunted by some spirits that are only slightly nicer than some of the nearby neighbors.</div><div><br /></div><div>Bag of Bones: B-</div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b><u>1999</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon:</b> Young girl gets lost in the Great North Woods. Can she survive or will whatever else is out there in the woods with her get her first?</div><div><br /></div><div>The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon: A+</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Hearts in Atlantis:</b> Five stories of differing lengths. The longest is essentially a novel, the shortest is a very short, short story. All a loosely stitched together by the characters involved. </div><div><br /></div><div>Hearts in Atlantis: A</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Storm of the Century: </b>The script for the TV mini-series of the same name. Evil holds an island town hostage. It's price? Either one of the kids or all of the kids.</div><div><br /></div><div>Storm of the Century: B+</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>2000</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>On Writing: </b>A book about the craft of writing from someone who's done quite a lot of it.</div><div><br /></div><div>On Writing: A</div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b><u>2001</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>Dreamcatcher: </b>An alien invasion starting near a hunting cabin in the woods. Four friends may be all that stands between the aliens and humanity. Or maybe not?</div><div><br /></div><div>Dreamcatcher: B-</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Black House:</b> The sequel to the Talisman finds our hero older and dealing with murders caused by a serial killer or are they being done by a haunted house?</div><div><br /></div><div>Black House: A-</div><div><br /></div><div><b>From a Buick 8: </b>What looks like a car is actually a dimensional portal to a place where stuff isn't as nice as the cops who are tasked with watching over it.</div><div><br /></div><div>From a Buick 8: B</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>2002</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>Everything's Eventual: </b>14 short stories by King. Several good stories but any deficiencies in them is blown away by the amazing 1408.</div><div><br /></div><div>Everything's Eventual: A-</div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b><u>2003</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>The Dark Tower V: Wolves of the Calla: </b>The Ka-Tet has to defend a town whose children are regularly taken by an unknown enemy.</div><div><br /></div><div>The Dark Tower V: Wolves of the Calla: B+</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>2004</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>The Dark Tower VI: Song of Susannah: </b>Everyone comes to the "real" world to deal with various issues. Some are protecting the Rose. Others are protecting the author. And Susannah's gonna have a baby.</div><div><br /></div><div>The Dark Tower VI: Song of Susannah: A-</div><div><br /></div><div><b>The Dark Tower VII: The Dark Tower:</b> The Ka-Tet finally finishes its journey and get to the tower. Well they get to the tower anyway.</div><div><br /></div><div>The Dark Tower VII: The Dark Tower: A-</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Faithful (Written with Stuart O'Nan): </b>Two die-hard Red Sox fans chronicle a year of ball games. As fate would have it, the book has a very happy ending.</div><div><br /></div><div>Faithful: B-</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>2005</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>The Colorado Kid: </b>Maine locals discuss a cold case in which a man was found dead on the beach.</div><div><br /></div><div>The Colorado Kid: A</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>2006</u></b></div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><b>Cell: </b>What if cell phones could be used to take control of the mind of anyone who answers the call? A journey of those who didn't answer.</div><div><br /></div><div>Cell: B+</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Lisey's Story: </b>Widow of a famous writer discovers that her dead husband was dealing with a lot more than just crazy fans. Only now she has to deal with the crazy fans too.</div><div><br /></div><div>Lisey's Story: A</div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b><u>2007</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>Blaze (Written as Richard Backman): </b>Gangster type with some mental handicaps tries to continue a life of crime after his best friend dies. Things go about as you'd expect.</div><div><br /></div><div>Blaze: A-</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Duma Key: </b>Ex-construction company owner has to deal with the aftermath of being run over by a crane. Perhaps painting is the key to health, or perhaps it's just a doorway for an ancient evil to escape its prison.</div><div><br /></div><div>Duma Key: A-</div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b><u>2008</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>Just After Sunset: </b>13 short stories from King. Highlights include: Graduation Afternoon, N, and A Very Tight Place</div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><b>Just After Sunset: A-</b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b><u>2009</u></b></div><div><br /></div><div><b>Under the Dome: </b>Small town is trapped under an invisible dome. Survival is less a matter of food and more a matter of trying to stop the crazy politician from killing everyone.</div><div><br /></div><div>Under the Dome: A</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>2017</u></b></div><div>
<b><u><br /></u></b><b>Gwendy's Button Box (Co-written with Richard Chizmar): </b>A short story about a girl who is given a magic box that will give you whatever you want, but at a pretty steep price. Also a return to Castle Rock. A tight story well told.<br />
<b><br /></b>
Gwendy's Button Box: A<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Sleeping Beauties (Co-written with Owen King): </b>The women are all falling asleep and not waking up. The men are left to their own devices. Testosterone takes charge. Not a horror book. Wants to be more of an adventure story combined with a psychological look at the nature of the sexes. Mostly succeeds.<br />
<br />
Sleeping Beauties: B-<br />
<br />
<b><u>2018</u></b><br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b>The Outsider: </b>How can a man be murdering a boy at the exact same time he is at a convention many miles away. King's take on a doppelganger.<br />
<br />
The Outsider: B<br />
<br />
<b>Elevation:</b> Short story sold as a novella. Scott Carey is slowly losing weight but not body mass. Though really the story is about his interaction with other folks in Castle Rock with the weight loss stuff as a side story. This probably would have been better received if it had been in a collection of short stories and not trying to survive on its own. The ending just seems monumentally naive to me.<br />
<br />
Elevation: B-</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>2019</u></b></div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><b>The Institute: </b>Uprising by the people being used as guinea pigs in a strange secret laboratory.</div><div><br /></div><div>The Institute: B+</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>2020</u></b></div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b>If It Bleeds: </b>Four Novellas by King. </div><div><br /></div><div><u>Mr. Harrigan's Phone:</u><b> </b>What if you started getting calls from a cell phone buried with an old man?</div><div><br /></div><div>Mr. Harrigan's Phone: A-</div><div><br /></div><div><u>The Life of Chuck:</u> Story of a man who's life is ending, but told out of sequence. </div><div><br /></div><div>The Life of Chuck: B+</div><div><br /></div><div><u>If It Bleeds:</u> The return of Holly Gibney. Holly uncovers another 'outsider' and has to deal with it.</div><div><br /></div><div>If It Bleeds: A-</div><div><br /></div><div><u>Rat:</u> Author with writer's block makes a deal with a rat. </div><div><br /></div><div>Rat: B</div><div><b><u><br /></u></b></div><div><b><u>2021</u></b></div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><b>Later: </b>School kid can talk to dead people. A cop uses him to save her job. Things go south from there.</div><div><br /></div><div>Later: B+</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Billy Summers: </b>Hitman takes a case to kill some bad folks, ends up helping a girl with problems of her own.</div><div><br /></div><div>Billy Summers: B+</div><div><br /></div><div><b><u>2022</u></b></div><div><br /></div><div><b>Gwendy's Final Task (Written with Richard Chizmar):</b> Gwendy's given a final task to save the world. The world doesn't end, but the story does weakly.</div><div><br /></div><div>Gwendy's Final Task: C+</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Fairy Tale: </b>Boy helps out old neighbor and finds out there's a portal to another world hidden in the shed. Can he help save that world?</div><div><br /></div><div>Fairy Tale: B+</div><div>
<br />
<br />
[1] - You can read my attempts <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2015/04/stephen-king.html" target="_blank">HERE</a>, <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2015/04/carrie.html" target="_blank">HERE </a>and <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2015/05/salems-lot.html" target="_blank">HERE</a>. Better efforts are done by<a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2017/06/the-losers-club.html" target="_blank"> the Loser's Club.</a><br />
<br />
[2] - I don't hate this as much as some. I think if you read it with the mindset that a lot of what Charlie thinks he's seeing on the faces or in the minds of others is just as much a creation of his derangement as his actions and reasons for what he's doing, the book is pretty good.<br />
<br /></div></div>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-25488554203233191842022-03-23T20:37:00.000-04:002022-03-23T20:39:12.786-04:00New Paradigm for Economic Systems<p> </p><p class="MsoNormal">If you study basic economics, you will learn that there are
4 economic systems: traditional, free market, command and mixed. Without getting too bogged down in the
details here’s a quick rundown of them.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">A <b>traditional economy</b>
is one that places a huge priority on tradition and customs. They are uninterested in innovation and
growth and are more concerned with keeping things the same. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">A <b>free market economy</b>
is one in which there is no outside control on what you do. You are 100% free to decide what you want to
do with your time, money, resources, possession and anything else.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">A <b>command economy</b>
is the opposite of that. You have no
freedom to decide. Every decision is
made by some form of central authority, probably the government. They control
everything.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">A <b>mixed economy</b>
lies between a free market and a command economy with some freedom to decide
and some control by an authority.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Three of the four lay on a nice, simple spectrum. We have free markets on one side, command on
the other and mixed in the middle. </p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg7GDTGzH0uxrmRPkW4bI8n2UcTFdMVQVQ1UYt_x7d5q-k9v_4w5s6dEBgFYaxPBmOTzweMSMZCTNAUhqcSdevRAK8y3YjMOdJMCs29XeN8_P1NqqCf2wgWdtuPyajjp7eWJtMgowyP-JI53NgJyYFuDuuTRXS-JpHk75k0gVtl47QFwFoui0rj12wGvg=s500" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="98" data-original-width="500" height="88" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg7GDTGzH0uxrmRPkW4bI8n2UcTFdMVQVQ1UYt_x7d5q-k9v_4w5s6dEBgFYaxPBmOTzweMSMZCTNAUhqcSdevRAK8y3YjMOdJMCs29XeN8_P1NqqCf2wgWdtuPyajjp7eWJtMgowyP-JI53NgJyYFuDuuTRXS-JpHk75k0gVtl47QFwFoui0rj12wGvg=w449-h88" width="449" /></a></div><br /><p class="MsoNormal">Traditional economies sit off to the side. Because of their unwillingness to engage in
other markets and their insular nature, they can often be effectively ignored.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">It seems a pretty simple system. Except it has always nagged me that
traditional economies are sitting off on their own like some sort of unwanted
leftover. It makes things not so pretty
or simple.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">I don’t want to digress into a long discussion on political
ideologies, but bear with me for a second.
<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">
</p><p class="MsoNormal">A lot of people look at political ideologies in a similar
way. We have a nice precise
spectrum. Liberals on the left,
conservatives on the right, and the moderates are in the middle. <o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgjax2U6pILJ2902fcicsN2uqJc47UkbPXlgXx5OBxHbKcumReWgYDo2EIN-s0e6Q-N1mbr3zO3K6JKcjSM3cO1H_ddmV1Zf1TM4V35wrIaA-DzkpA6ZLb1RbCoAbaKT4Qt_5Cy5D6dqQRt9jBJq5jD_ry6LzwlxV1oSIrApNReLbedeztfLrPFmoQ0qA=s591" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="100" data-original-width="591" height="93" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgjax2U6pILJ2902fcicsN2uqJc47UkbPXlgXx5OBxHbKcumReWgYDo2EIN-s0e6Q-N1mbr3zO3K6JKcjSM3cO1H_ddmV1Zf1TM4V35wrIaA-DzkpA6ZLb1RbCoAbaKT4Qt_5Cy5D6dqQRt9jBJq5jD_ry6LzwlxV1oSIrApNReLbedeztfLrPFmoQ0qA=w551-h93" width="551" /></a></div><p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Instead of a line, a better diagram is a diamond. Because there isn’t just one axis. The left-right axis is still liberal and
conservative, but there’s a second axis with libertarians at the top and big
government or statists at the bottom. It
looks like this.<o:p></o:p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjwNflb8r-6yWshypwe8w-epf9atv6-dYjFyMYqtpZgUnV2-F6YUgw3jWRNIuaeZh-8pMv4yUQph19RjSd_5ZyfFGqsbzjSbDrGOKaluQnoYE-Ftcb08l8KL_JxPC3ygODSiTl10vye5g1HWLUQngY2KK3VJNfiFuwWo5LG_yKl0dYLU8Ea0UMWd_H7BQ=s490" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="382" data-original-width="490" height="382" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjwNflb8r-6yWshypwe8w-epf9atv6-dYjFyMYqtpZgUnV2-F6YUgw3jWRNIuaeZh-8pMv4yUQph19RjSd_5ZyfFGqsbzjSbDrGOKaluQnoYE-Ftcb08l8KL_JxPC3ygODSiTl10vye5g1HWLUQngY2KK3VJNfiFuwWo5LG_yKl0dYLU8Ea0UMWd_H7BQ=w490-h382" width="490" /></a></div><p align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><br /></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">This isn’t a post about government ideology, so I’m not
going to into it any more than that. If
you’ve never seen this before, search a bit on the internet. It’s easy to find. The point is that what seems to a lot of
people to be a spectrum on a line, actually exists on a plane.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Okay, back to econ.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">What if there’s a second axis for economic spectrums? <o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">
</p><p class="MsoNormal">What if traditional economies are not some weird outlier
that don’t mesh with the others, but are just another cardinal point? What if instead of a line, the diagram for
economic systems should also look like this?<o:p></o:p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjWlvvcl-sLH4CceKGnBYSy_M7D5RqyEVwQuDDUk1hX_a2-hinVlzEM5Tu3eODBgtQ-fb4V9EjAxuCK3emfBTE1b9HpDNPYPY3veIYwqVk_AaYUCtCSRjpvxi7jFrCg0WwSjDuVhaAcGqGLh3F9CtxbhCY7wWlFTYiUOj2cFyFk8EcJ8ZOzXUGuwyDInQ=s480" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="377" data-original-width="480" height="370" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjWlvvcl-sLH4CceKGnBYSy_M7D5RqyEVwQuDDUk1hX_a2-hinVlzEM5Tu3eODBgtQ-fb4V9EjAxuCK3emfBTE1b9HpDNPYPY3veIYwqVk_AaYUCtCSRjpvxi7jFrCg0WwSjDuVhaAcGqGLh3F9CtxbhCY7wWlFTYiUOj2cFyFk8EcJ8ZOzXUGuwyDInQ=w472-h370" width="472" /></a></div>
<p class="MsoNormal">The question then becomes, what goes opposite traditional
economies?<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">The definition of a traditional economy says it is a system
in which tradition and custom are most important. They aren’t interested in innovation, but
instead in continuing on doing things the same way they have always been done.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Perhaps then a working definition for the opposite would be
an economy that is constantly looking for new ways to replace the
outmoded. In which a tradition, custom
or method only lasts as long as it is useful.
An economy in which we are always seeking a better alternative and once
it is found we abandon the old.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Except that doesn’t take it far enough.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">I’m sure there are some who will disagree, but the optimal
spots on both the political ideology diagram and the economic systems diagram
are not in the corners.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">An economy with 100% government control or 100% freedom is
not desirable. There are huge negatives
to both. Instead we want something in
between. There’s a lot of ground in the
definition of a mixed economy, and we can argue about just how far to the left
or right of center is optimal, but mixed is where we want to be.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Similarly, nobody wants to be all the way in the corner of
traditional. In truth, there are no true
free markets or true command economies.
Every economy has at least some government control and everywhere has at
least a small amount of freedom.
Similarly, I doubt there are any true traditional economies out there
either. <o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">But if we use the working definition we just created of what
lies opposite traditional and place that in the opposite corner, I can not only
envision such an economic system, I can see it working. It looks like a solid plan. The problem with our working definition of
what lies opposite traditional is that it’s too perfect. If it was the opposite corner, everyone would
want to be there. <o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Given all that, it seems the opposite would need to be an
economy in which we favor innovation to the extreme. It would be an economy in which doing things
the same way would be discouraged.
Tradition, custom and old methods would have no value. <o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">In fact, doing things the same way twice would be
discouraged.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">“No economy could work like that!” you declare. “It couldn’t sustain itself.”<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Exactly.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">There are no true free markets or command economies because
in the long run they don’t work. They
can’t sustain themselves. Somewhere in
the middle is best.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">There are no true traditional economies either. Thus there also wouldn’t be a true opposite
of traditional in existence either. The
ideal is somewhere in the middle.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Thus the opposite corner has to be the Novel Economy. The economy in which new is best and old is
always bad.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">I was tempted to call this opposite corner an innovative
economy. But that won’t work. Innovation implies making things better. This economy wouldn’t be worried about making
things better, it would be worried about making things different and new.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Sometimes new is better.
But sometimes the old way is the better way.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">
</p><p class="MsoNormal">Thus our diagram should look like this:<o:p></o:p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgSGHDKfLdvFYKsVzKn2OKJgSys5qhHrBd94Q5k8mTxrPeQjsjF-sirMiMAbJye8GSoWGM4fytwdHyRgPGB6iSqtdewpPFbd6UvWsXfXHFQMeLxdU4pmCJrANjkJgbXNwoeg-HgyEYWeEP4d09x0q4hjybGFuckRqtdHzPA1GUAR01iIuXiEuYw331KeA=s480" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="377" data-original-width="480" height="371" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgSGHDKfLdvFYKsVzKn2OKJgSys5qhHrBd94Q5k8mTxrPeQjsjF-sirMiMAbJye8GSoWGM4fytwdHyRgPGB6iSqtdewpPFbd6UvWsXfXHFQMeLxdU4pmCJrANjkJgbXNwoeg-HgyEYWeEP4d09x0q4hjybGFuckRqtdHzPA1GUAR01iIuXiEuYw331KeA=w473-h371" width="473" /></a></div>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><p class="MsoNormal">The left-right axis is the personal freedom axis.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The further left you go, the more freedom you
have and the less control anyone else (including the government) has on
you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The further right you go, the less
freedom you have and the more control someone else (probably the government)
has on you.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The up-down axis is the change axis.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The further up you go, the more you are
concerned with keeping things the same and the less you want to find something
new.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The further down you go, the less
you are concerned with keeping things the same and the more important creating
change becomes.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The best spot will be somewhere in the middle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Closer to the mixed zone in the center.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How far off the center and in which direction
is the best is something we can argue about.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></p><p></p>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-42569573888250394842020-05-30T23:02:00.001-04:002020-05-30T23:02:08.539-04:00Challenged to Post, "Without Comment"[It's been a minute since I wrote something here, but I thought I'd put this out there so I could easily reference it later should it become needed.]<div><br /></div><div>Someone has challenged you over the next X days to post on some media platform pictures of:</div><div><br /></div><div> - Your favorite albums of all time.</div><div><br /></div><div> - The movies that were most influential on you.</div><div><br /></div><div> - The books could you read over and over.</div><div><br /></div><div> - The [some way of pretending to get random things] photo(s) on your phone. [1]</div><div><br /></div><div> - The food you blah blah blah . . . </div><div><br /></div><div> - The place(s) you would yadda yadda yadda . . .</div><div><br /></div><div> - etc, etc, etc.</div><div><br /></div><div>Let's be clear, I'm not opposed to these sorts of things. I most likely am interested in what you might have to share. After all, the reason we are ostensibly friends on whatever social media platform this is occurring on is because we both chose to be. Thus, I probably care some amount about you and am interested at least on some level about who you are, what you care about, and other parts of you life.</div><div><br /></div><div>But here's the supposed kicker, you have to post them, "without comment". </div><div><br /></div><div>Though I'm probably reading more dramatic emphasis into it than is really there, I always imagine it more like:</div><div><br /></div><div>"I was challenged to post this, <b><i>WITHOUT COMMENT!"</i></b> [Dum, dum, dummmmmmm!] [2]</div><div><br /></div><div>But the question is, why?</div><div><br /></div><div>Why wouldn't you comment? What point is there to the whole thing if you don't comment?</div><div><div><br /></div><div>Oh, here's some photo that seems important . . .</div><div> . . .but I've no idea why.</div><div><br /></div></div><div>Hey look, they like a movie that 90% of people like . . . </div><div> . . . what a non-surprise.</div><div><br /></div><div>They've read that famous book . . . </div><div>. . . that millions of other people have read too. </div><div><br /></div><div>Complete non-shocker, and honestly, I don't care.</div><div><br /></div><div>Of course if you were to comment then suddenly I do care. Because now I know that the reason you picked that photo was because of [something meaningful and/or interesting].</div><div><br /></div><div>Or maybe it wasn't. Maybe you just like the way you look in that photo. Or you just want to show the world your cute kid(s).</div><div><br /></div><div>Maybe you just like that movie because of that one fight scene. Or that one line. Or because of that hot actor/actress is in it. </div><div><br /></div><div>And I suspect that's one of the real reasons people are so pleased to post "without comment". Because they have nothing to say beyond, "I liked this." Because their 10 things are completely banal and in truth uninteresting. </div><div><br /></div><div>A second reason is probably that after posting and commenting on 1 picture of their kid/dog/self/whatever that fulfills the requirement of this supposed challenge, they would really have nothing left to say on days 2 through 10.</div><div><br /></div><div>A third reason, and most likely to most applicable is that people are lazy.</div><div><br /></div><div>So, before I wrap this up. Let me actually challenge you.</div><div><br /></div><div>The next time someone "challenges" you to post pictures of whatever "without comment", I challenge you to completely ignore the lets 'o', 'u' and 't' in the word "without" and to post them WITH comments.</div><div><br /></div><div>Because let's be honest. One of the main reasons you accepted this "challenge" is that you were hoping people will think the things you picked are cool/interesting/say something about you, and/or that you want people to talk with you about it. </div><div><br /></div><div>There's nothing wrong with that, so skip the hoping someone will take the lame bait of a pic with no comments and start the conversation yourself. </div><div><br /></div><div>I for one will be way more likely to: </div><div><br /></div><div> - pay attention</div><div> - think about what you've posted for more than half a second</div><div> - post a comment</div><div><br /></div><div>And if the person who challenged you complains about your changing the rules, just reply to them with a link to this post.</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Challenged to Post "Without Comment": D-</b></div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><br /></div><div>[1] - This is "Pretending to be random" because: A) if the randomly selected picture isn't something you want others to see; or B) isn't cool enough; or C) you really want to pick some other picture, we all know your just going to pick whatever you want.</div><div><br /></div><div>[2] - That's a bad attempt at dramatic sounding music.</div><div><br /></div>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-64275680644212859612019-01-29T13:07:00.000-05:002019-01-29T13:07:13.188-05:00Oreo The Most Stuf<a href="https://www.amazon.com/OREO-Most-Cookies-13-57oz-Package/dp/B07MKDFZ98/ref=sr_1_4_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1548785038&sr=8-4&fpw=pantry&keywords=the+most+stuf" target="_blank">Oreo The Most Stuf:</a><br />
<br />
I had heard that these were coming out a several months ago and was intrigued. The Boys love them some Oreos [1]. The Bish in particular loves the creme. There has been more than one occasion in which I've entered the kitchen to find six slightly damp outer cookies from an Oreo licked clean of all traces of their insides laying abandoned on the table.<br />
<br />
So when I was at Target the other day and I saw the Most Stuf's at the end of the register, I figured I owed it to them [2] to buy a pack.<br />
<br />
When I got home as I unbagged my loot, Jude was close by. He was immediately as intrigued as I was, so I knew I'd made the right decision. We opened the package and each tried one.<br />
<br />
If you haven't seen these yet, they are just your standard Oreo crammed with an extreme amount of filling. If you look at them, you can see the individual levels of creme from several cookies laid on top of each other. Some of them look pretty clearly like they have three levels of creme. Though others look like they must have four.<br />
<br />
Your standard Oreo has about 53 calories per cookie.<br />
A Double Stuft cookie has about 70.<br />
The Most Stuf have 110 calories per cookie.<br />
<br />
If you wondered if you could ever have too much Oreo creme in your cookie, the answer is a definitive 'yes'.<br />
<br />
Most of the creme ends up gooshing [3] out from between the outer cookies. Not that it matters, because you can't really taste the cookie part at all. It's just a lot of creme.<br />
<br />
A LOT OF CREME<br />
<br />
Not terribly long later I was sitting at my computer and I noticed that my teeth hurt. Yes, that's right, the Most Stuf cookies made my teeth hurt. I'm not sure if that means they are too much or I've gotten old [4], but I do know that I won't be eating another one. [5]<br />
<br />
For what it's worth, Jude declined to have a second one.<br />
<br />
When the Bish saw the package he laughed out loud in glee [6]. I'm sure if I let him he would plow through the whole package in one sitting. Limiting him to two at a time, he's still managed to polish off over half the package so far. [7]<br />
<br />
<b>Oreo The Most Stuf: C</b><br />
<br />
[1] - But then again Oreo is the best selling cookie in the world, so we could probably take that as a given.<br />
[2] - I swear I did it for them alone.<br />
[3] - Technical industry term.<br />
[4] - That's a lie, I'm totally sure that they are too much.<br />
[5] - By which I mean a third one, because I totally ate two the first time. Science.<br />
[6] - And I mean that literally. He actually laughed out loud in glee.<br />
[7] - Don't judge, he's got baby teeth. They're going to fall out anyway.<br />
<br />
<br />Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-12156020000828575552018-02-01T18:00:00.001-05:002018-02-01T18:00:57.254-05:00Freddy's Frozen Custard & Steakburgers<b>Freddy's Frozen Custard & Steakburgers:</b> Every since they opened up a location near my work, I have been itching to go eat at Freddy's. Today I finally managed to do it.<br />
<br />
Early inquiries to others that had already been there generally garnered responses that were something akin to: "It's a lot like Steak & Shake."<br />
<br />
It's not.<br />
<br />
I personally find Steak & Shakes burgers to be pretty mediocre. So much so that on the rare occasion that I do end up at a Steak & Shake, I don't order one. [1]<br />
<br />
Freddy's burgers are nothing like Steak & Shakes. Which isn't to say that they are better (or worse really) but more to say that they are a completely different brand of mediocre.<br />
<br />
The meat in my burger had been smooshed so thin as to be essentially non-existent. I didn't pay attention to exact amount of meat promised me, but whatever amount it was they got every millimeter of surface area out of that they could. Much like the picture on the menu promises, the meat did hang over the edges of the bun by a substantial amount. I'd rather they had taken that extra inch in circumference and added back onto the burger proper.<br />
<br />
The fries at Freddy's were very similar to S&S. Personally I am not a fan of shoestring fries. So, I didn't find them to be that enticing, but if you do like ultra thin fries, these seemed to be of a serviceable variety.<br />
<br />
Near the counter where you pick up your food, they had dispensers of "Freddy's Fry Sauce". It is a vaguely pink/orange color that tasted to me like mayonnaise with a very small amount of ketchup in it. Much less ketchup than your typical "special sauce" or thousand island dressing. So it was really kind of just mayonnaise. Which was okay. But then again I like mayonnaise a lot. However, it certainly wasn't anything that I need to rush out and get again.<br />
<br />
I opted to switch out my drink for a shake made with their much touted frozen custard. I got the chocolate variety. When it first arrived, it was so thick that even the straw provided was insufficient to get any of it to my mouth. And that is saying something as the straw they give you is nearly half an inch wide. [2] A half hour later, after my meal, when I got back to my place of work, it was just starting to be drinkable.<br />
<br />
The ultra-thickness of the shake was not itself necessarily a negative. I'm fine with eating my shake by using the straw like a spoon if needed. But the flavor was again, nothing to right home about. It was completely ordinary. Which given the rest of the meal was what I thought might save the entire Freddy's experience. Because let's be honest, the real reason you go to Steak & Shake is the shakes.<br />
<br />
The atmosphere at the restaurant wasn't great. Nobody looked like they were having a good time or enjoying themselves. This includes the employees and the patrons. [3]<br />
<br />
As for the price, it was pretty high. I got the number 1 combo, swapping a shake for the coke and it cost nearly $12. For $12 I could have gone to <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2012/07/cheeseburger-bobbys.html" target="_blank">Cheeseburger Bobby's</a> and had a fantastic burger, great fries, a drink and a shake/sundae that was superior as well.<br />
<br />
Freddy's slogan is "The taste that brings you back."<br />
<br />
Not likely. [4]<br />
<br />
<b>Freddy's Frozen Custard & Steakburgers:</b> C-<br />
<br />
[1] - I often get a patty melt.<br />
[2] - And yes, I measured it.<br />
[3] - It was kind of like what I imagine the waiting room to purgatory is like.<br />
[4] - Alternate ended to this post: Freddy's slogan is "The taste that brings you back." Add the words "to Cheeseburger Bobby's" to that and it's true.<br />
<br />Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-69488358869872007322017-06-25T21:35:00.003-04:002017-10-08T16:23:56.864-04:00The Loser's Club<b>The Loser's Club:</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
My three favorite authors in no specific order are: Dick Francis, Nick Hornby and Stephen King [1] I own everything that they've ever written. [2] Moreover, I've read all of it too. [3] That isn't really saying much for Hornby, he's not written that much. Francis has written tons [4] but they are light, quick and enjoyable reads that you can finish in a day or two. But this post isn't about them, it's about King (sort of).<br />
<br />
King has written a TON of books. [5] And no they are not all "horror" novels. [6] A few are light and quick. A few are dense and long. Most live somewhere in between. About a year ago or so [7] I decided to reread all of my King books in the order that they were written. [8] I was also going to post about it on the way. You can read the initial post <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2015/04/stephen-king.html" target="_blank">here</a>. And here are my posts on <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2015/04/carrie.html" target="_blank">Carrie </a>and <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2015/05/salems-lot.html" target="_blank">Salem's Lot</a>.<br />
<br />
It was at that point that my dedication to posting sort of died. [9] <br />
<br />
But it is not where my reading stopped. Currently I just finished Thinner and am taking a break before I read Skeleton Crew to read Sleeping Beauties. [10]<br />
<br />
I know you dedicated readers of this blog [11] were real sorry that happened. But have no fear! Enter <a href="https://consequenceofsound.net/podcasts/the-losers-club/" target="_blank">The Loser's Club: A Stephen King Podcast</a> by<a href="https://consequenceofsound.net/" target="_blank"> Consequence of Sound.</a><br />
<br />
Like some sort of divine serendipity, this podcast began in January of this year. Filling the immense void left by my failings. In essence it is a podcast doing what I set out to do, but doing it much, much better than I ever could. They started at Carrie and have been working their way forward. There 33rd episode just reviewed The Running Man. And in a near future episode they will get to the Gunslinger.<br />
<br />
The basic layout of the podcast changed a bit since the beginning, but here is how it currently works. There is an episode every Friday, but the format alternates between two types. Every other week there is an in depth discussion, review and analysis of a Stephen King work. And on the in between weeks there is a look at what is going on in the real world as it relates to King. <br />
<br />
The King centered episodes usually involve talking about King's tweets, news about upcoming movies, books, TV shows and the like that are King related and sometimes answering questions from listeners. [12] Book episodes have segments on how the novel was written, looking at specific characters, discussing the gory bits, discussing the salacious bits [13], looking at how this novel fits in and connects to the greater King Universe and reviewing any adaptations of the work. [14]<br />
<br />
If that sounds like a lot for one podcast. It is. But it is awesome. <br />
<br />
One of the things that sometimes bugs me about podcasts and TV/radio discussion/interview shows is that you know that you only have a set amount of time. You know the show is limited to 30 minutes or an hour and you really want to hear person X talk about whatever it is the interview is about. But then things get off on a tangent and while the tangent might be super interesting. This is what's going on in my world:<br />
<br />
Host: I'd really like to talk some more about that great new [THING] you have out. But first, didn't I hear somewhere that you got a new puppy?<br />
Guest: Yeah. She's great. She's a mix of a . . . .<br />
Me: There's only five minutes left! Stop talking about the puppy! Talk about the [THING]! AAAARRRGGGHHH!!! [15]<br />
<br />
The point is you do not have to worry about that with this podcast. If they want to go off on a tangent and talk about puppies. Have no fear, there is still plenty of time to get back to King. Plenty of time. Seriously. Their current record is the<a href="https://consequenceofsound.net/podcast-episode/episode-12-the-stand-pt-2-and-the-dark-tower-trailer/" target="_blank"> second episode on The Stand</a> [16] which is nearly four hours long. And it was all worth it.<br />
<br />
I hope they never change.<br />
<br />
There are six or so different hosts, but in the current set-up only three or four at a time are on any one episode. I could spend time talking about each, but if you are wondering what kind of people spend hours talking about Stephen King and if you've bothered to read this far into this post and are still interested, the answer is that they are just like you and me. [17] <br />
<br />
So far my only real concern with the podcast is the fear that they will quit making it before they get to the end. [18]<br />
<br />
To sum up:<br />
<br />
If you like Stephen King.<br />
If you REALLY LIKE Stephen King.<br />
And listening to people talk about his work sounds interesting to you.<br />
You are doing yourself a disservice if you don't start listening to this podcast immediately.<br />
<br />
It's great.<br />
<br />
The end.<br />
<br />
<b>The Loser's Club: A+</b> [19]<br />
<br />
Sweater nubbins.<br />
<br />
[1] - There are days when I should really say four favorites and add Michael Chabon to that list, but this evidently isn't one of those days.<br />
[2] - With a couple very esoteric exceptions.<br />
[3] - With a couple of rare exceptions.<br />
[4] - For the record I am including the books by Felix Francis in this grouping.<br />
[5] - The Interwebs says 56 novels, six nonfiction books and several short story collections that contain most of his over 200 published short stories. And when I say Interwebs, I mean <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stephen_King" target="_blank">Wikipedia</a>.<br />
[6] - Saying Stephen King is a horror writer is like saying Michael Chrichton is a dinosaur writer. Except that sounds stupid. But you get the idea.<br />
[7] - I don't really remember and I don't care to figure it out, just accept that it was late in 2016.<br />
[8] - Don't judge.<br />
[9] - And when I say "sort of", I don't mean sort of at all. I mean it died. Shriveled up and faded away like Tad Trenton and no movie adaptation is going to save it. (There's a King reference for all the real fans.)<br />
[10] - For the record, I'm not just reading King.<br />
[11] - Consisting of my wife and some blogbot in Russia evidently.<br />
[12] - With other random tidbits thrown in for goodness.<br />
[13] - Pound Cake!<br />
[14] - Plus more random goodness.<br />
[15] - Okay maybe I've over dramatized that, but you get the idea.<br />
<div>
[16] - To further prove the point, they spent four episodes on just The Stand. It was great.</div>
[17] - Complete nerds.<br />
[18] - Should that day come, it will be a sad sad day in my life.<br />
[19] - Honestly, I actually get excited every time I realize it is Friday and there's a new episode out. (Don't judge.) (Also 19.)Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-61753489499648389942016-09-10T23:45:00.000-04:002016-09-10T23:45:57.877-04:00Arby's Buffalo Chicken Sandwich<b>Arby's Buffalo Chicken Sandwich:</b> <br />
<br />
Arby's has a buffalo chicken sandwich and I have a quest to find the best spicy chicken sandwich in the world. [1] Thus there was nothing I could do except head out to the land of America's Roast Beef [2] and not order roast beef.<br />
<br />
When I was young, McDonald's had a McChicken Sandwich that I loved. [3] This was before they offered Chicken McNuggets. [4] The patty on the sandwich was coated in the same goodness that the McNugget would later get. In fact if you took the McNugget that is generally round shaped [5] and increased its size and thickness proportionately until it was bun sized you would pretty much have it exactly. You had to be very careful when you ate it because if it had just come out of the fryer [6] you were very likely to burn the ever-lovin' out of your tongue or to scald off the roof of your mouth. [7]<br />
<br />
Though Arby's chicken sandwiches [8] as shown on the posters in the store look all bumpy and textured so as to make you think they might have actually come straight off some chicken's breast, the one I got was as flat as a pancake and bore a more than striking resemblance to that old McChicken patty. <br />
<br />
Somewhere behind the counter they must have a vat of buffalo sauce and when you order the sandwich they much drop your selection in said vat and let it swim around for a minute or two. Which is just a really wordy way of saying that the patty on my sandwich was drenched and dripping in buffalo sauce. Something, that when I initially saw it, I thought was a good thing.<br />
<br />
The bun was different than Arby's usual bun, but if there was a taste difference to it, I couldn't tell you about it. [9] There was also the obligatory smattering of shredded lettuce and some kind of white sauce. The website says it is: "Parmesan Peppercorn Ranch Sauce". I do remember there being one bite where for the briefest of moments I tasted something other than buffalo sauce, but the memory, like the flavor, is fleeting.<br />
<br />
Honestly the whole thing tasted just fine. It wasn't that spicy, but if you like buffalo sauce [10] this sandwich has it in spades. Which is really where the problem lies.<br />
<br />
My original intention was to eat the sandwich as I drove to my next destination. I had purchased my food inside [11] and I'd opened the carton on my lap in preparation of heading on. I was preparing to take my first bite before putting the car in reverse when the literal slipperiness of the situation became evident.<br />
<br />
Remember, we have a flat as a pancake chicken patty slathered in an ocean of buffalo sauce with only a few shreds of lettuce and tiny dollop of white sauce to slow it down. [12]<br />
<br />
In one bite my hand's (both of 'em) were covered in sauce. That's because you have to use both hands to keep the patty from escaping the bun. Take one hand off to get a napkin and that sucker is out of there like a greased pig flinging lettuce shreds as it moves. [13]<br />
<br />
When I finished, there was enough sauce in the carton that I could have covered my potato cakes in them as well. [14] It took two napkins and two baby wipes to get my hands close to clean.<br />
<br />
This is not a sandwich to be eaten in a moving vehicle.<br />
<br />
In the end it's too messy and not spicy enough for me to ever care to order it again. [15]<br />
<br />
<b>Arby's Buffalo Chicken Sandwich: B-</b><br />
<br />
[1] - You can read about it<a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2012/11/spicy-chicken-sandwiches.html" target="_blank"> here.</a><br />
[2] - Yes, Sir!<br />
[3] - Yes, I know that they still have a McChicken sandwich, but the thing has gone through so many incarnations and reinventions that they are probably on the McChicken Mark XXII at this point.<br />
[4] - There's a story that goes with this, but while this is the place, this isn't the time.<br />
[5] - You were aware that all McNuggets come in one of three shapes weren't you?<br />
[6] - Oh yes, it was cooked in the same grease as the french fries. I told you it was good, didn't I?<br />
[7] - You might be wondering what all this has to do with Arby's. I'll get there. I promise.<br />
[8] - See, told you I'd get there.<br />
[9] - A lake of buffalo sauce defeats the subtle nuances of bread variations.<br />
[10] - And if you don't, then why in the world did you order this sandwich?<br />
[11] - The line at the drive through was ridiculously long. Also the planet appreciates it when you turn the car off instead of idling.<br />
[12] - I've never seen a buffalo sauce Slip 'n Slide, but I'm pretty sure I know exactly what it would look like.<br />
[13] - This analogy has gotten a bit weird.<br />
[14] - If I hadn't already eaten them first. What? Did you think I was a savage?<br />
[15] - Chick-Fil-A's Spicy Chicken Sandwich still reigns supreme.Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-25717204094897649002016-01-29T16:44:00.000-05:002016-01-29T16:44:12.431-05:00Maple Bacon Pop-Tarts<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01AIO3FYA/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B01AIO3FYA&linkCode=as2&tag=misbgra-20&linkId=ANNS7KBGUZYT3RTV" rel="nofollow">Frosted Maple Bacon Pop-Tarts</a><b>:</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
Several months ago I happened to be surfing around the Interwebs and I came across a page talking about the next year's upcoming new Pop-Tart flavors. Though I haven't mentioned it much, I eat quite a lot of Pop-Tarts [1] Needless to say, I was quite excited.<br />
<br />
Amongst the new flavors was the subject of this blog: Frosted Maple Bacon Pop-Tarts.<br />
<br />
I was immediately both completely intrigued and terrified. This had the potential to be something mind-blowingly delicious or completely disgusting.<br />
<br />
I couldn't wait to try them.<br />
<br />
Fast forward through the holiday season [2] and into the new year and much to my joy and chagrin there they were on the shelf at my local Publix. I immediately snatched up a box with glee.<br />
<br />
When I showed them to the Pook, she declared without hesitation that it sounded disgusting and that she would not be trying them. The Bear and the Bean both declined any future tastings as well.<br />
<br />
At this point my expectations were running a bit high. I wanted this to either be the most amazing or most disgusting thing I'd eaten in forever. [3] <br />
<br />
If they were going to be good, I imagined them tasting mostly like maple candy. A strong, sweet syrupy taste that would be delightful and in the background, not too strong, but strong enough not to be missed, would be a smoky bacon flavor.<br />
<br />
If they were going to be bad, it would make me want to vomit.<br />
<br />
Either way would have been fine with me.<br />
<br />
A few days later on Monday morning, I was driving to work with the package on the seat beside me ready to be consumed. [4]<br />
<br />
The minute you open a pack your immediate area is completely filled with the overpowering smell of maple. Okay, to be more specific I should say the overpowering smell of fake maple scent. But it smelled good! My stomach growled in excitement. My brain gave up its last reservation and got on board.<br />
<br />
I pulled a tart from the pouch and took a bite.<br />
<br />
Sadly the strong fake maple scent is as close to anything maple that these breakfast treats [5] have to offer. <br />
<br />
It's hard to say exacctly what they taste like. They're a bit like a cookie, but not really a sweet cookie. Nevertheless they also taste a bit like sugar, but not that sugary. Sort of cake-y but not. They're kind of like those cookies your grandmother used to give you that when you were done eating left you thinking, "Why did I bother?" <br />
<br />
Which is to say that the initial flavor of the Maple Bacon Pop-Tarts didn't offend me, but they didn't excite me either. The first flavor was completely and totally, 'meh'.<br />
<br />
But then once you've swallowed and the food is out of your mouth, the second wave of FAKE BACON FLAVOR comes crashing onto your pallet. [6] <br />
<br />
Imagine a bottle of stale <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2012/03/bacos-bacos-are-two-edge-sword.html" target="_blank">Bacos</a>.<br />
<br />
Now imagine it being worse than that. <br />
<br />
Now take it two steps further. <br />
<br />
You're just about there.<br />
<br />
The first problem here is that this is not a flavor that goes with breakfast.<br />
<br />
The second problem is that it tastes bad. <br />
<br />
Okay. You're right. The first problem is the bad taste. It's all moot from there.<br />
<br />
And then after a few seconds, that flavor is gone too and you're left with an empty mouth, an empty heart and most of the rest of a Maple Bacon Pop-Tart to choke down.<br />
<br />
After a few more experimental nibbles, I discovered that if you just ate the thing continuously without stop, you never give the FAKE BACON FLAVOR a chance to come crashing down on you. That is, until you finish the pop-tart and then all of it comes hammering on your brain in an ultra-concentrated wave of BAD.<br />
<br />
Deciding only half a breakfast was better than continuing on, I declined to eat the second tart in the pouch. <br />
<br />
A few days later I gave away the rest of the box to a bunch of teenagers. They mostly agreed with me.<br />
<br />
Maple Bacon Pop-Tarts: D+<br />
<br />
[1] - Don't judge me.<br />
[2] - Gingerbread Pop-Tarts ftw<br />
[3] - Possibly since those <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2013/08/mussels.html" target="_blank">Mussels</a>.<br />
[4] - I had to wait for Monday. Saturdays and Sundays are reserved for <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2012/03/cereal-love-cereal.html" target="_blank">cereal</a>!<br />
[5] - Maybe calling it a "treat" is going a bit too far.<br />
[6] - The ALL CAPS is intentional. Because that's how this flavor is. It's in all-caps as it demands your attention.<br />
<br />
<br />
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B01AIO3FYA&asins=B01AIO3FYA&linkId=PJBNA2MZSVUUVJDR&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-19236704237495428412015-12-09T22:46:00.000-05:002015-12-09T22:46:37.822-05:00Holiday Police Blotter<b>Holiday Police Blotter:</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p> </o:p>“Dispatch this Delta 25.
I’m at the scene now.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Roger, Delta 25.
What’s the situation?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“It looks like an 11-81.
Nothing too serious. The vehicle
collided with a snow drift and got upsot.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Come again, Delta 25.
Did you say ‘upsot’?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“That’s correct dispatch.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Do you need an ambulance?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“It doesn’t appear so.
The passenger, one Fannie Bright, reports minor injuries. The driver appears unhurt. I suspect intoxication is the cause.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Did you administer a field sobriety test?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“No, but witnesses report the vehicle was moving at a high
rate of speed. Several described it as
‘dashing’. They also report the driver
as laughing the entire time.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Roger, Delta 25.
What’s your recommendation?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I’m going to bring the driver in. The passenger will need a taxi. Also, we may want animal services to look at
the horse. It seems a bit thin to
me. Possible abuse and mistreatment.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I’m sorry. Did you
say, horse?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Roger, dispatch.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
----------<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“911. Please state
your emergency.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“There are people here trying to rob me.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Ma’am, are there intruders in your house right now?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“No, not in my house.
They are on my front lawn.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“How many people is it?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“About eight.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“You say these people tried to rob you?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Yes. They keep
yelling at me and demanding that I give them things.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“What sorts of things are they demanding?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Food mostly.
Something made with figs, I think.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Did you tell them to leave?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Yes, several times.
But they insist they won’t leave until I get them what they want.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Okay, ma’am. Sit
tight. An officer will be with you
shortly.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-----------<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Unit 5, this is Walter.
I’m at the intersection of fourth and main. Are you in the area?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Roger that, Walter.
I’m a few blocks away on the square.
How can I help you?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I’m going to need help apprehending a suspect and a vehicle
to transport him once he’s in custody.” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Are we gonna need additional back-up?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I don’t think so. So
far he seems harmless. Mostly just
disturbing the peace and public indecency.
Also jaywalking.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Jaywalking?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Roger. I’m actually
on traffic detail. This character came
running through here like he’s got a death wish. I hollered for him to stop, but he ignored me
and ran into traffic. He’s lucky he
didn’t get hit.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Can’t you just ticket him and send him on his way?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Don’t forget about the public indecency. He’s actually naked.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Did you say naked?
As in no clothing?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I guess he’s not technically 100% naked. He’s wearing what looks like an old top
hat. Also, though it isn’t actually clothing,
he’s carrying a broom stick.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Did you try to apprehend him?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Yes. He’s rather
fast. He keeps slipping by me yelling,
‘catch me if you can’.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Okay, I’m in route.
Just out of curiosity, what color is this guy?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Oh, he’s white. Real
pale. I think he probably avoids the
sun.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-----------<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Hi. I’m Officer
Brynner. How can I help you?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"I need to get a restraining order. Is this where I do that?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Yes, Ma’am. Sit here
and let me get some information from you.
What’s the name of the person you need to get the restraining order
against?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Honestly, I’m not sure.
He goes by Nick, but he seems to go by a lot of different names. I think Nick is short for Nicholas but he’s
not from around here. It might actually
be Niklaus or something like that."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"That’s all you have?
No last name?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Sorry."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Niklaus, sounds Russian or Slavic. Is that where he’s from?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"I don’t know. He
doesn’t look like a foreigner. But I
think I remember someone saying something about him coming from somewhere up
north."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"That’s not really a lot to go on. But we’ll come back to that later. Let’s focus on why you need the restraining
order. What’s happened?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Well, honestly he’s been stalking me."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"That’s pretty serious.
Tell me some of the details."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"He says that he’s watching me all the time. When I’m sleeping. When I’m awake. Frankly, it’s kind of creepy."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Is he in your house?
Or are there cameras?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"I don’t think he’s in my house. Though he does seem to be able to get into
and out of places with ease. Doesn’t
matter if the doors are locked or not. I
don’t know how he does it. Maybe it’s
magic."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"So you’re saying he’s some kind of burglar? Has he threatened you?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Not directly. He
keeps saying he’s judging me. If I don’t
live up to his standards there’s going to be consequences."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"How long has this been going on?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Oh for years. Since I
was a kid."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"For years!? Why have you waited so long to come forward?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"I was afraid. He’s
warned me in the past about complaining or crying out. If I do he’ll come back to town."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"So he’s not in town now?
Do you know where we can locate this man?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"No. But I do know
that he’s coming back to town sometime in the early winter."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"If you can’t give us a name, perhaps you can give us a
physical description or work with a sketch artist."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Actually, I’ve never seen him."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Ma’am, I don’t mean to sound insensitive, but are you sure
this person is real?"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Oh definitely, my parents told me he was."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
---------------<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Unit 12, this is Central.
Do you copy? Over.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
. . .<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Unit 12, are you there? Over.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
. . .<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Unit 12?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“This is Unit 12.
Sorry, it’s hard to hear over all the noise here.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Are you at the site of the Motel 6 disturbance?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I am at the location, but it’s not actually at the Motel 6. It’s located by the barn behind it.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Roger that. What’s
your status. How can we help you?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“There’s quite a crowd gathered. I’m going to need back up.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Additional units will be dispatched. Do you need a paddy wagon?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I’m not sure at this point.
There are quite a few people here, but it’s relatively peaceful. Mostly I need help just sorting out what’s
going on.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Roger that Unit 12.
How big of a crowd are we talking?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I’d guess it to be over 200.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Come again. Did you
say over 200?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“That’s right. Of
course that’s not counting all of the animals.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“How many animals? Do you need animal control?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Quite a few actually.
Though I think most of the sheep came with the shepherds.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Unit 12 are you saying that in addition to a flock of sheep
there are more animals?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Central, that’s correct. There are some goats. Some horses.
A couple cows in the barn. I
haven’t counted them, but I can hear them lowing. There are some donkeys, including one with
unusually long ears. There’s quite a few
smaller things as well: some mice, some birds up in the rafters . . . an owl I
think, a badger, rabbits, other field animals, a few cats and dogs and the like,
maybe even a fox. And there are also the
camels.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Was that camels?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Yes, I think they were brought here by the three foreign guys.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Foreign guys? Do you
need a translator?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Probably, but I don’t know what language they speak. They seem to have come from far away and
based on the gold and spices they are carrying they seem rather wealthy. Also, I don’t know why, but I’d characterize
them as wise.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Six shepherds and three foreign men are quite a long way
from over 200.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“There’s also the little girl with the rose and the little
boy playing the drums.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“It’s the middle of the night, are their parents there, Unit
12?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I don’t think so. We
probably need child services as well.
Also an ambulance.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Is one of the children hurt?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“No, there’s a newborn that needs to be taken in and checked
out.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“An unattended newborn?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Sorry, no the mother is here. We’ll need a bus for her as well. Based upon the conversation and what I saw in
the straw, I think she just gave birth.
It’s a bit of a mess in there. So, a hazardous materials clean up team
isn’t out of the question. There’s also an adult male. But there seems to be some confusion over
whether or not he’s the father. ”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I make that a total of 15 people. Who else is there?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Well, there are a whole lot of other people singing.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Come again, Unit 12. How many?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I’m not sure. Lot’s. I’d call it a host really. They’re hard to count. As I said they are all singing and milling about. It almost looks like they’re flying at
times. I think they’re excited about the
baby. Also there may be an aerial unit
in the area already. Anyway, something
is in the sky shining a spotlight on us.
It’s adding to the confusion. Honestly
I’m not sure but I think I saw three ships, a submarine and a baseball team as
well.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Unit 12, you understand there are no harbors in the city?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Yeah. Okay. I must be mistaken on that one.<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Okay Unit 12.
Dispatching to your location: additional units for crowd control, animal
control, child services, a translator and a protocol officer for the foreign
dignitaries, an ambulance for newborn and mother, a hazardous materials cleanup
team and just to be safe the fire department, a paddy wagon and a field psychiatrist
too. Will that cover it?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: xx-small;">Copyright SBaumann 2015</span></div>
Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-43048524032132663952015-11-24T17:55:00.000-05:002015-11-24T17:55:56.286-05:00Zooey vs Darius<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B005KJZDXK/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B005KJZDXK&linkCode=as2&tag=misbgra-20&linkId=ZAHTTBMAJAQJTFTB" rel="nofollow">A Very She & Him Christmas</a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://ir-na.amazon-adsystem.com/e/ir?t=misbgra-20&l=as2&o=1&a=B005KJZDXK" height="1" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important;" width="1" /> (2011) vs <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00NMUCMAG/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B00NMUCMAG&linkCode=as2&tag=misbgra-20&linkId=P5WEUIOJZXGGEXKC" rel="nofollow">Darius Rucker: Home For The Holidays</a> [1] (2014):<br />
<br />
I acquired both of these albums very recently [2] and I guess in the interest of full disclosure I should reveal that I haven't actually finished listening to the Darius Rucker CD yet. [3]<br />
<br />
A Very She & Him Christmas is what some might call minimalist. There's Zooey Deschanel and there's Matt Ward and there are the smallest number of instruments possible on every song. The instruments are played softly, the songs are sung low and the whole thing proceeds at a pace that would make a turtle say, "Dude, that's kind of slow." [4]<br />
<br />
Nevertheless the CD is very enjoyable. Again, if you are looking for something to sing or dance to at your Christmas get together this is not the disc for you. However if you want something to play in the background while you're wrapping presents or having a romantic date during the holiday season you need look no further.<br />
<br />
Some of the reviews I read online said that they found Zooey's singing flat, emotionless or just plain bad. But I suspect those people were missing the point. She isn't trying to set new holiday cheer world records, nor is she trying to out sing previous performers or the instruments. The entire thing is meant to be slow, low and dreamy.<br />
<br />
One song of note is their version of Baby It's Cold Outside. In an interesting twist, they switched the roles and she sings part usually sung by the guy. It worked well for me. The Pook said she liked it better than most other versions of the song. [5]<br />
<br />
A Very Hootie Christmas is exactly what you expect it to be. It's Hootie. He's singing your favorite Christmas songs [6] in a way that sounds exactly like Hootie singing Christmas songs. He's got that resonant deep voice. The music is grand and full. This is exactly the CD you want playing in the background at a Christmas party. It's great.<br />
<br />
<b>A Very She & Him Christmas (2011): B+</b><br />
<br />
<b>Darius Rucker: Home For the Holidays [1] (2014): A</b><br />
<br />
<br />
[1] - A.K.A. - A Very Hootie Christmas<br />
[2] - "Acquired" meaning bought on Amazon and "recently" meaning yesterday.<br />
[3] - Of course that isn't going to stop me from grading it. <br />
[4] - What? Everyone knows turtles are kind of hip in an old school way and say things like "dude" all the time.<br />
[5] - But then again the Pook hates that song. She calls it the "date rape song".<br />
[6] - Including Baby It's Cold Outside. Sorry Pook.<br />
<br />
<br />
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B005KJZDXK&asins=B005KJZDXK&linkId=EG4FD6UYYUWUY3X7&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B00NMUCMAG&asins=B00NMUCMAG&linkId=2ORB6JLMFEYN5JLZ&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-56587126674060811372015-08-04T22:15:00.001-04:002015-08-04T22:15:43.412-04:00Serendipity<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B004SIP9RO/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B004SIP9RO&linkCode=as2&tag=misbgra-20&linkId=3DXR2ZKEOTLHNPTF">Serendipity (2001):</a><br />
<br />
Serendipity: a fortunate coincidence.<br />
<br />
Serendipity: a movie starring John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale.<br />
<br />
The premise of this movie is a little far fetched, but intentionally so. Two people meet by accident, spend a few hours together and then part to go back to their individual lives. But because they feel like there might be more to this meeting than it seems and at the same time don't want to read too much into what might really be nothing, they leave it in fate's hands. She writes her name and number in a book and sells the book to a used bookstore. He writes his name and number on the back of a five dollar bill, which then gets spent on a pack of mints. If they were meant to be together, the book will find its way back to him and the fiver will end up back with her.<br />
<br />
The movie continues with an unforgettable series of almost connections and near misses between the two. So much so that in another movie you would be hard pressed to accept them. But since the premise of this movie is that fate might just be tinkering in people's lives, in this case it works wonderfully.<br />
<br />
Call me a hopeless romantic, but there is something compelling and wonderful about the whole thing. Fate, karma, destiny, whatever you want to call it, keeping these two people circling around each other but never meeting until the time is perfect, until it is the right time for them to find each other.<br />
<br />
I'm not sure that I necessarily believe that it works out that way every time for everyone. I suspect there are plenty of people in the world that would be a perfectly good match for any given person. But at the same time, while that may be true, maybe there is that someone out there that is the perfect match for each of us and if we would just sit still long enough and pay attention to what's happening maybe our paths will come together at the exact right moment.<br />
<br />
For instance, maybe that moment is in an otherwise 'meh' class you take while getting your masters and suddenly a little voice in your ear whispers, "That girl sitting in front of you. You're gonna marry her." But you've got to be paying enough attention to hear it.<br />
<br />
Add in Jeremy Piven and you've got a fantastic movie.<br />
<br />
<b>Serendipity: A</b><br />
<br />
<b><br /></b>
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B004SIP9RO&asins=B004SIP9RO&linkId=OKKV2JPY2HEZD56V&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-78769095881235875542015-07-05T20:22:00.000-04:002015-07-05T20:22:33.412-04:00Chex Cereals<a href="http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=as_li_ss_tl?_encoding=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&field-keywords=chex&linkCode=ur2&tag=misbgra-20&url=search-alias%3Daps&linkId=UEPLPFF2FYWVPC6B" target="_blank">Chex Cereals</a><b>:</b><br />
<br />
For various reasons, we're going to cover all of the current Chex cereals in one post. [1] We will also be leaving out the 6,000 varieties of Chex Mix. [2]<br />
<br />
If you somehow don't know what I'm talking about when I say Chex then you should really get out of your bed more often and/or watch something on TV that has commercials. [3] <br />
<br />
Visually all of the Chex are the same: little crispy squares of interlaced grains, vaguely pillow shaped [4] so they can hold milk.<br />
<br />
With one exception they all have the quick to soggy problem of many grain cereals. They aren't as bad as corn flakes, but you'd still better not dally once the milk hits the bowl.<br />
<br />
<b>The Varieties:</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Corn/Rice Chex:</b> I realize that these are two different varieties of Chex and thus might deserve two different grades, but let's be honest, besides the name and a slight color variation these two are interchangeable and otherwise identical. They don't taste bad, but then again they don't really taste like much of anything. They are also the quickest to turn to mush in your bowl. <br />
<br />
They also come in a box larger than your average cereal box. This might seem like a boon, but after you've eaten five bowls and are now sick of them, the box will sit and mock you from the pantry shelf for the next six months until you finally overcome the potential guilt and just throw them away.<br />
<br />
<b>Corn/Rice Chex: B- [5]</b><br />
<br />
<b>Wheat Chex: </b>Wheat Chex is the exception to the "Chex gets soggy quick in milk" rule. They will eventually lose a bit of their rough edges, but unless you go off and watch a Peter Jackson movie between pouring the milk and eating, they will maintain crispiness throughout.<br />
<br />
They taste pretty good. Their taste improves significantly if you sprinkle just a bit of sugar on them. [6] I honestly buy them pretty regularly.<br />
<br />
Speaking of regular, you want to be careful about how much Wheat Chex you eat. Alternately, if you decide to finish off the box in a few consecutive sittings, I would suggest not straying too far from your favorite toilet. Too much Wheat Chex will clean you out like a freight train through your bowels. [7]<br />
<br />
<b>Wheat Chex: B</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Honey Nut Chex:</b> This is the dirty trick of Chex varieties. They promise to be so much more, but then fail to deliver. [8]<br />
<br />
Honey Nut Chex [calling from cereal aisle shelf]: Mr. Customer! Buy me! I am sweet and delicious. I have nuts. I have honey. I am so different from these other plain varieties. You must buy me!<br />
Me: Um. Isn't that what you said last time?<br />
HNC: No, that wasn't me. That was <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2015/04/crispix.html" target="_blank">Crispix</a>.<br />
Me: Are you sure.<br />
HNC: I promise. Think of the honey. Think of the nuts. Think of the children.<br />
Me: Okay<br />
<br />
The next morning you discover once again that you've been fooled into buying a box of Corn Chex in which the cereal has a light coating of something that makes it glisten slightly before it gets wet. Once the milk hits them the truth is revealed and both the you and the Chex are sad.<br />
<br />
<b>Honey Nut Chex: C- </b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Vanilla Chex: </b>A relative newcomer to the Chex Universe, Vanilla Chex rode in on the heels of Chocolate Chex [see below] and made it's bid for glory. Alas it bid too low. They are not bad, but not good enough to ever bother buying unless the store is out of Chocolate Chex.<br />
<br />
<b>Vanilla Chex: C+</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Chocolate Chex:</b> They is where the goodness lies. Chocolate Chex are good stuff. Chex covered in cocoa powder and other chocolate-y type goodness. But they don't coat every piece. No they leave about a third uncovered and normal. That way you can still feel like you are eating a "good for you" cereal. <br />
<br />
They are good with milk and they are good by the handful straight out of the box. In fact, I usually end up eating them both ways since once you're done with a bowl of them, you wanna have more. [9]<br />
<br />
<b>Chocolate Chex: A</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Cinnamon Chex:</b> I must admit to having failed you in my quest to fully educate you about Chex. I actually have never tried these. I think cinnamon flavored things are okay, but the flavor doesn't really excite me terribly. Thus, I have never bothered to buy these, though there were two or three times when I thought more than ten seconds about it, but then I bought Chocolate Chex. [10]<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=as_li_ss_tl?_encoding=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&field-keywords=chex&linkCode=ur2&tag=misbgra-20&url=search-alias%3Daps&linkId=UEPLPFF2FYWVPC6B" target="_blank">Chex on Amazon</a><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="https://ir-na.amazon-adsystem.com/e/ir?t=misbgra-20&l=ur2&o=1" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important;" width="1" />
<b>Cinnamon Chex: ??</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Chex Clusters - Fruit and Oat: </b>While thinking about writing this post, I discovered online that they now also have a new variety of Chex. Once I see them on a shelf, I'll buy some and update this post.<br />
<br />
<b>Chex Clusters: ??</b><br />
<br />
<b>Past Varieties:</b> Doing some research on the Interwebs [11] I found out that there are several past varieties of Chex that have come and gone. Most of them I had never heard of, [12] but I do remember Frosted Chex. Not well enough to grade them, but enough to visualize the box in my head. <br />
<br />
I have clear memories of Bran Chex. If Wheat Chex is a freight train, then Bran Chex was Grand Central Station with all lines running. [13] Also it tasted worse than Wheat Chex, so I'm not surprised it went away.<br />
<br />
Finally, I have a memory of a Chex cereal that had little bits of nuts, brown sugar or other crunchy type goodness hanging off of each piece of cereal. I don't recognize any of the list of Ex-Chex types as what I am remembering, maybe it was the Honey Graham Chex. I just remember liking it. [14]<br />
<br />
<b>Chex Cereals: B+</b><br />
<br />
[1] - Not the least of which is that I'm lazy. Also, other reasons that should be evident as you read. Also, if you haven't already read it, here's a really old post about <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2012/03/cereal-love-cereal.html" target="_blank">Cereal</a> in general you can read.<br />
[2] - I'm also not commenting on the Gluten Free Chex Oatmeal, because <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2012/03/oatmeal-original-thought-when-creating.html" target="_blank">Oatmeal</a> is nasty.<br />
[3] - And not just the same two commercials you get on Hulu during any given stretch of time<br />
[4] - Couch not bed.<br />
[5] - They probably scored a little higher than you might have thought given the commentary, but they are redeemed in part because of <a href="http://www.chex.com/recipes/chex-muddy-buddies/6c7c1895-131a-4591-a874-04e686633e11" target="_blank">Muddy Buddies</a><br />
[6] - That wasn't a joke saying you should pour a ton of sugar on them, really just a light sprinkle is sufficient.<br />
[7] - Don't say I didn't warn you.<br />
[8] - I feel compelled to tell you, before you read the next exchange, that for reasons I cannot explain the box of Honey Nut Checks in the vignette speaks with a French accent.<br />
[9] BONUS: Looking for a great late night snack? Put them in a bowl and cover them with a generous amount of lite Cool Whip. Give a very light mix and enjoy. Delicious and relatively lo-cal. You can send me a thank you letter in the morning.<br />
[10] - Why not buy both, you ask? If I'm going to spend that much money, I'll just buy another box of Chocolate Chex. Or maybe a Wheat Chex if the mood strikes me.<br />
[11] - By which I mean <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chex" target="_blank">Wikipedia</a>.<br />
[12] - Wheat and Raisin Chex? Strawberry Chex?<br />
[13] - Or was that visualization a little too much?<br />
[14] - It's probably also why Honey Nut Chex still manages to sucker me once a year or so.<br />
<br />
<br />
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B00R1GZONE&asins=B00R1GZONE&linkId=NBP4BHAFTHKM6BK3&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-24439467267925817512015-05-15T13:18:00.002-04:002015-05-15T13:18:46.696-04:00'Salems Lot<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0307743675/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0307743675&linkCode=as2&tag=misbgra-20&linkId=27JIHBX3BUEFXSI7">'Salem's Lot</a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://ir-na.amazon-adsystem.com/e/ir?t=misbgra-20&l=as2&o=1&a=0307743675" height="1" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important;" width="1" /> by Stephen King:<br />
<br />
As amazing as this book is, the more amazing thing is that it is only King's second book. <br />
<br />
<a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2015/04/carrie.html" target="_blank">Carrie</a> is good, but the difference between these two books is stunning. It's almost like it was written by someone else. <br />
<br />
Don't get me wrong Salem's Lot is definintely a King book, steeped in his personal style and tone, but it is so much fuller and complete than Carrie.<br />
<br />
If you somehow don't know, the book concerns the events that take place when vampires start to take over a small town in Maine.<br />
<br />
It is downright creepy in all the best ways.<br />
<br />
I've never actually seen all of the movie that was based on the book [1], but I've seen a few scenes from it and those have been good and creepy as well. It's my understanding that the movie is well worth the watch. [2]<br />
<br />
I can confirm for you that the book is well worth the read.<br />
<br />
It is firmly couched in all of the standard vampire tropes, but also has some less known ideas about these creatures of the night that, if not actually drawn from actual myths, feel like they should be becaus they fit so well with the established ones.<br />
<br />
One thing I don't like about the book is the bleak ending. I know that King said when he originally started to write it, he meant for the vampires to win in the end, but as the writing progressed the story changed. While the good guys do "win", it isn't much of a victory and I'm a sucker for a happy ending. <br />
<br />
Another interesting side note is how one of the main-ish character's end story is never resolved. At some point, he shuffles out of the town and you don't hear from him again. Which is interesting because nearly thirty years later King picks up the thread in an entirely different set of books almost as if he had known all those years before what he was doing. [3]<br />
<br />
The only other thing about the book that isn't the best, in my opinion, is how easily the main vampire dies. Everything up to that point comes hard and costly to the protagonists, it's almost a let down the ease with which they finally do succeed. <br />
<br />
Honestly, if you haven't ever read this book, you should give it a shot.<br />
<br />
<b>Salems Lot: A</b><br />
<br />
[1] - Something I hope to rectify in the near future.<br />
[2] - Which is often not true for King movies.<br />
[3] - More likely the loose end in Salem's Lot was just that, which was just fortuitous serendipity years later.<br />
<br />
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=0307743675&asins=0307743675&linkId=44AQI6SHKGNJCMPD&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-60016293294944119402015-05-05T11:48:00.001-04:002015-05-15T12:26:25.096-04:00Smart Phones<b>Smart Phones:</b><br />
<br />
I currently have in my pocket the entirety of recorded human knowledge.<br />
<br />
Okay, so maybe not the entire entirety, but pretty darn close. <br />
<br />
And while I know the following comparison has been made before, that isn't going to stop me from making it again.<br />
<br />
If you go back not terribly far in time you can find the TV show Star Trek. We can stop pretty much anywhere along the timeline of Star Trek. We can go all the way back to just before my arrival on this planet to the original series, or we can choose any of the later shows as well. <br />
<br />
One of the cool things that the crew members all had was a communicator. In the original series it looked like a non-streamlined flip phone. In later series it was a part of the badge on their uniforms. But either way it was sci-fi and "from the future". <br />
<br />
Only now, everyone has such a device and the ones we have are much, much cooler. [1]<br />
<br />
When the Star Trek crew would beam down to a planet, one member of the away crew would be lucky enough to carry a tri-corder. Using this device they [2] could get information about the world around them. <br />
<br />
I have to assume that the reason only one person was allowed to carry this was because it was either very expensive or very complicated to use.<br />
<br />
If that original crew was to beam down to the sidewalk in any area in the U.S. today they would be woefully under-teched. Essentially every person they saw would have a better device then the squad of people from the far future [3] and that includes the ten year old listening to the latest Taylor Swift song that they just downloaded two seconds earlier. [4]<br />
<br />
Of course the Star Trek guys all had phasers, but let's be honest, they aren't going to shoot anyone anyway. And if they did, it would just be to stun them. So, they end up just being glorified tasers after all.<br />
<br />
Smart Phones are an astonishing bit of modern life that we already take for granted. It wasn't that long ago that they didn't even exist. It's only a few years back and your best phone doesn't even connect to the Internet. A few years before that and they don't even text. A few years more and the device you use to stay connected when you are away from home is a pager [5] and when you are at home the top end phone will let you roam about, just as long as you don't get too far away from the base unit. And finally a few more years back and the only phone you've got is connected to the kitchen wall with a twirly cord that's a knotted mess. [6]<br />
<br />
Today's smart phone does it all. In fact, if I have one complaint about them it's that we really need a new name for them. Because of all the things that they do, acting as a phone is probably the one we use the least.<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>My Internet Surfing, texting, photo taking, music playing, memo writing, game playing, weather telling, news reporting, shopping center, dictionary, pedometer, electronic book, movie taking, flashlight, compass, video playing device that incidentally also works as a phone: A+</b><br />
<br />
<br />
[1] - Actually I'm not sure if anyone actually sells cell phones that look like Star Trek badges. I'm going to have to assume that it is possible. After all we have people walking around with widgets stuffed in their ears looking like they are conversing with Lando. How hard would it be to add a speaker and pin it on your shirt.<br />
[2] - Often Bones in the Original Series. <br />
[3] - Okay not <i>every</i> person. They would still have my mom outclassed, but what can you do?<br />
[4] - While one of their crew is bent over a device three times bigger trying to peer into the view finder.<br />
[5] - It's a thing. Look it up and be astonished.<br />
[6] - And let's not even go back that final step to a rotary phone.Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-13531473179493412072015-04-30T11:42:00.003-04:002015-04-30T11:42:39.851-04:00On Writing - Stephen King<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1439156816/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=1439156816&linkCode=as2&tag=misbgra-20&linkId=4OUY7T6T7OFLGAM7">On Writing: (By Stephen King):</a><br />
<br />
I was reminded of this book by an old friend and so I dug it off of the shelf and took a side journey from my other stack of books to read it. I got this book years ago and I really don't know why I hadn't bothered to read it before now.<br />
<br />
The book is divided into three sections. The first is composed of several vignettes and stories from King's past that are intended to give a glimpse into his inspiration for writing and his becoming a published writer. The second is King answering questions about being a writer and the third is simply advice from King to anyone who wants to be a writer.<br />
<br />
I suspect most people would think that the first section would be very interesting, the second less so and the third probably downright boring. I found all three sections to be enlightening and entertaining. <br />
<br />
If you've been reading this blog for any length of time (or if you've just recently started and went back and read some of the old stuff) you should have sussed out that I'm trying to become a published author myself. [1] So, it stands to reason that I would like and care about King's advice on the topic. But even the second and third sections have their share of stories from King's life, so even a non-writer could enjoy them.<br />
<br />
I read the book with a grain of salt expecting his advice to be things that I either don't do or don't want to do or perhaps can't do, but by and large I was pleased to find that most of his advice are already common practice for me. I don't edit my stuff in later drafts with nearly as intentionally heavy cuts as King, but then again maybe I should.<br />
<br />
Really my only problem with the book is that for the most part its message seems to be a sudden shift in its message at the end. Most of the book seems to be saying: "Go out and write! I don't care who you are or what your experiences are. Give it a shot! There is no right way to do it. Just do it!"<br />
<br />
But then at the end there is a long section about a semi-fictional author's history of trying to get published. Which while informative, didn't really say anything that I hadn't guessed at or heard before and seemed to flow counter to the rest of the books message. This section seemed to be saying, "If you want to be a successful writer, then you'd better do it something similar to this."<br />
<br />
There is also a bit at the end about King's experience from fifteen years ago or so when he was hit by a van, was nearly killed and the surgeries and rehab he had to go through after. The books was finished while the pain of this was still ongoing and it seems to go back to the original message and perhaps with a hint of, "Writing is Life. Don't stop" thrown in for good measure. I promise not to stop writing, now if I could just find someone to publish it.<br />
<br />
<b>On Writing: A</b><br />
<br />
[1] - I have written four novels so far, but have yet to succeed in finding someone help me get them from my harddrive onto a bookshelf. Anyone know of an agent looking for clients?<br />
<br />
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=1439156816&asins=1439156816&linkId=RRIHRLSYS4TMWNEC&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-28415317569377628862015-04-29T11:14:00.001-04:002015-04-29T11:25:56.932-04:00Carrie<b>[Stephen King's books have been around for quite a while and I can't really see much of a way to talk about them without giving away plot points and such. So, if you've managed to avoid finding out what happens in his books up to this point and want it to remain that way, I would advise not reading any of my write-ups of his work.] [1]</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Carrie:</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
Stephen King's first book is pretty short and almost should be called more of a novella than a novel. It however was not the first Stephen King book that I ever read. [2]<br />
<br />
Long before I got around to reading it, I knew the basic plot and what it was about. Girl has telekinetic powers and gets blood dumped on her at the prom, violence ensues. It was hard not to know about that second fact, anyone who saw the cover of the VHS tape or perhaps the movie poster could easily figure that out. I'm not sure how I came about the TK knowledge.<br />
<br />
I've never liked reading a book or watching a movie when I know what's gonna happen at the end. So maybe that explains why I put off reading this one for so long. At any rate, when I did finally get around to reading it the first time, I consumed it in practically one sitting. This time around it took slightly longer, but not by much. [3]<br />
<br />
I very much enjoyed it both times. It is a simple straightforward story. Meet the societal outcast. See how the outcast lives. Dump some more on the outcast. The outcast explodes.<br />
<br />
There are lots of books that are variations on the theme. Mostly the variations are just what type of outcast we are dealing with and how successful (or not) the resulting explosion is. This one also dabbles in the 'the outcast starts to rejoin society' sideplot as well.<br />
<br />
For all of its simplicity it is a very engaging and well told tale. I particularly like how King intersperses the story with news articles, court testimony and other things along the way. I was honestly surprised to find out that he added all of that in the second draft as an attempt to make what was essentially a long short story into a sllightly short novel.<br />
<br />
The story about the book goes that when he first sat down to write it, he was so unhappy with it that he threw in the trash and gave up on ot. Only to come home and find his wife had fished it out of the trash, read it the first several pages and pushed him to continue. <br />
<br />
Looking at it this time having read the many King books that come after, you can see that the unique Stephen King style and tone are already well developed and present in this book The flow of the story and the characters themselves are very similar to even his most recent stuff.<br />
<br />
Perhaps what is most interesting is that for all that the book is a Stephen King type of 'horror' novel, it really isn't a book about the supernatural. Sure Carrie has telekinetic powers and sure she uses them to blow up the town at the end of the book, but the bulk of the novel and the real meat of the story have nothing to do with that. At its heart it is just a story about a girl on the outskirts of societal norms that is pushed beyond the breaking point. The story could be changed to have her lose the TK and instead simply shoot up the town and the message essentially remains unchanged. Perhaps that is why this and many other King books are so successful.<br />
<br />
<b>Carrie: A</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Movie Footnote: </b>I've never seen the original movie made after the book. My understanding is that it is actual pretty decent. Something that can't often be said about the film version of Stephen King works. I believe there was also a more recent remake and if memory serves that one was deemed pretty terrible.<br />
<br />
[1] - Which is a long way of saying, 'spoiler alert'<br />
[2] - That would be Firestarter, but more on that when I read/grade it.<br />
[3] - But as I already said, it isn't very long.Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-30834481923143726232015-04-25T14:26:00.002-04:002015-04-25T14:26:28.393-04:00Crispix<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00CK3ZX4I/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B00CK3ZX4I&linkCode=as2&tag=misbgra-20&linkId=BNSGEFRSMDQVDCTV">Crispix</a>:<b> </b><br />
<br />
I have memories of when Crispix was first introduced as a cereal.<br />
<br />
I remember the original commercial and the jingle and the slogan [1]<br />
<br />
I remember getting the cereal not long thereafter;<br />
<br />
And I have fond memories of eating it and truly enjoying its crispy goodness and flavor.<br />
<br />
. .<br />
<br />
Memories lie.<br />
<br />
Crispix was on sale recently so I bought some. When I got around to opening it [2] I was greeted with familiar sights and smells. Crispix has that unique hexagon shape. Which, let's face it, is completely there so that you don't start thinking it is Chex. And it smelled just like I remembered.<br />
<br />
After the milk was poured I dug in.<br />
<br />
The flavor was okay. Nothing to write home about but nothing I will ever long for.<br />
<br />
In my memories Crispix is crunchy, but has some body to it. There is some substance to each little bit. <br />
<br />
In reality, each one has about the same thickness and substance as two corn flakes.<br />
<br />
But the real travesty is that while they are crispy right out of the box and they are crispy when the milk is poured, that is a condition that lasts for approximately five seconds after that.<br />
<br />
It's time for a new slogan. [3]<br />
<br />
<b>Crispix: C</b><br />
<br />
[1] - "Kellog's Crispix is crispy times two."<br />
[2] - Likely the next morning, but possibly that night.<br />
[3] - "Kellog's Crispix is crispy for two [seconds]."<br />
<br />
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B00CK3ZX4I&asins=B00CK3ZX4I&linkId=DK6AUQXQBGZWEKJ6&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-36276451184500051932015-04-20T21:36:00.001-04:002015-04-29T11:26:12.045-04:00Stephen King<b>Stephen King:</b><br />
<br />
This one isn't going to be much of a mystery when it comes to the ultimate grade, so I'll save you the suspense. He gets an A+.<br />
<br />
I once read a quote by person attempting to put down Mr. King's work in which they said something along the lines of, "He's the McDonald's of horror." <br />
<br />
I assume they meant that he's written quite a lot and that it seems made for the masses and thus isn't true literature. If you ask me, in the end, it's not much of an insult. If I could be the McDonald's of anything, I'd jump right on that opportunity. [1] Millions of dollars and millions of fans sounds pretty good to me.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Just because something is popular, doesn't make it bad. Just because something isn't <a href="http://misterbgrades.blogspot.com/2012/12/moby-dick.html" target="_blank">Moby Dick</a>, doesn't make it bad either. Stephen King books manage to itch some back, dark corner of your brain that needs a scratch every now and again. Sure there are probably lots of other creepier, scarier writers out there. I don't care.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I loves me some Stephen King books. </div>
<br />
As the Pook can attest, I literally own them all. <br />
<br />
And I've read them all. <br />
<br />
He is one of my three favorite authors. [2]<br />
<br />
While Mr. King is still putting out new material, it doesn't come out nearly as fast as I'd like, so to get an appropriate King fix, I've made the following decision.<br />
<br />
I'm going to reread all of them.<br />
<br />
Yes, all of them.<br />
<br />
From the really good (Misery, Salem's Lot, Firestarter) to the really bad (Insomnia, Tommyknockers).<br />
<br />
From the short (The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon, Carrie, Thinner) to the seriously long (The [uncut] Stand, The Dark Tower Series).<br />
<br />
and<br />
<br />
From the tame (Eyes of the Dragon) to the downright creepy and dark stuff (All Dark No Stars).<br />
<br />
And of course, I'll give it all a grade.<br />
<br />
My current plan is to go chronologically. [3]<br />
<br />
Feel free to read along if you'd like.<br />
<br />
<b>Stephen King: A+ </b>[4]<br />
<br />
[1] Heck, I'd be the Wendy's of anything.<br />
[2] The other two are Dick/Felix Francis and Nick Hornby. I own everything by them as well. In fact if you are looking for something new to read, I would heartily recommend any of the three.<br />
[3] I've actually already started Carrie. I'm about 40 pages in.<br />
[4] Told you so. Also, I should probably be clear that I am just talking about the books. Some of the movies are good. I few are great. Most kind of blow. The TV shows don't fare much better.<br />
<br />Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-71886450721663138752015-04-09T16:32:00.000-04:002015-04-09T16:32:57.045-04:00A Movie Plot<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00G5G7EXY/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B00G5G7EXY&linkCode=as2&tag=misbgra-20&linkId=VXLFZAH2KZWE65D6">A Movie Plot:</a><br />
<br />
Imagine this movie:<br />
<br />
The main character is a young man without a whole lot of prospects. Living in the shadow of his older siblings and with no real likelihood of getting/inheriting anything on the home front, he heads out to make his own way.<br />
<br />
Naturally he meets a girl and they immediately connect. They seem like a perfect match. But of course her family disapproves of their whirlwind romance.<br />
<br />
Determined to make it all work out the hero starts manipulating things. He's doing a little deceiving and he's working all the angles. He's got a lot of balls up the air and he's managing to keep everything in motion. And while what he's doing isn't exactly on the most honest and straight and narrow of paths, his heart is in the right place. He has a girl to win and a fortune to claim. <br />
<br />
Of course things start to spiral out of control and then just as it seems there is no way he can pull it off, *****[1] everything comes together. The girl is his and he's made a name for himself.<br />
<br />
Roll Credits.<br />
<br />
Perhaps at this point you are saying, "Mister B, this is not a very original movie plot."<br />
<br />
Well you would be right. There are countless movies that follow this general script. Off of the top of my head: The Secret of My Success, Some Kind of Wonderful, Opportunity Knocks, 10 Things I Hate About You, etc, etc, etc. Really just about every other movie made in the 80's<br />
<br />
Okay, now go back to the place marked with the five asterisks (*****) and change the ending. Scrap everything after that point and change it to:<br />
<br />
everything gets worse. The more he tries to keep it together the more things spiral out of control. The more they spiral out of control, the more frantic he gets. In the heat of the moment he starts making some bad decisions and before he knows what's really going on, he's stepped a bit too far over the line. Instead of the hero of our plot, he's the villain.<br />
<br />
I've just described Hans from Frozen.<br />
<br />
The more I watch this movie [2] the more I feel bad for him. One little twist of fate in the other direction and the credits are rolling, everyone is happy and he's got the girl.<br />
<br />
Yes, I know. You want Anna to end up with Kristoff. That's only because you've seen the movie as scripted. You've seen the wheels come off the wagon. But you can't deny Anna and Hans have a connection at the beginning of the movie. I don't know about you but I've never met someone before that I could immediately sing a complicated duet with. [3] They were BOTH singing, "You and I were just meant to be."<br />
<br />
If there was no Kristoff and the movie was scripted differently, you'd have been cheering at the end when they ended up together.<br />
<br />
Just saying. [4]<br />
<br />
<b>Hans [5]: B-</b><br />
<br />
[1] - Note this place. It will become important later.<br />
[2] - It's the Bean's favorite. We watch it and/or listen to the soundtrack a lot.<br />
[3] - Not even the Pook.<br />
[4] - Yes, I know he tries to kill Elsa with a sword. At that point, everything is so chaotic and out of whack he's been taken over by temporary insanity. You may be laughing now, but there are plenty of real world stories (and movie stories) in which someone gets caught up in the moment and takes things one step too far without really realizing how far over the line they've managed to get.<br />
[5] - Either a victim of bad luck or perhaps just simply on the wrong side of that Disney Magic.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B00G5G7EXY&asins=B00G5G7EXY&linkId=RLQFQ4EZZP66VB7L&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-78008746003866139312015-04-04T10:46:00.003-04:002015-04-04T10:46:53.340-04:00Led Zeppelin IV and Taylor Swift Red<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00M30SPMU/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B00M30SPMU&linkCode=as2&tag=misbgra-20&linkId=RL5LKKZF36FINU4D">Led Zeppelin IV</a> and <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B008XNZMOU/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B008XNZMOU&linkCode=as2&tag=misbgra-20&linkId=AMO5ECMXHZ6LTUBF">Taylor Swift Red</a><b>:</b><br />
<br />
I wandered into my local Disc-Go-Round [1] looking for a David Bowie CD [2]. I was unable to find the Bowie disc, so I began browsing looking to see if something else caught my eye. [3] It was then I remembered that my music collection was sadly lacking in that I actually didn't own any Zeppelin. [4] So I picked up Zeppelin IV and then Taylor Swift's Red CD caught my eye. I also didn't own any of her CD's, but in one of those weird serendipitous cosmic sets of coincidences, she and her music had come up a lot in several recent unconnected conversations and programs. [5] So I took it as a sign that I should get both.<br />
<br />
Before I actually gave either a listen it seemed obvious that this would be a perfect opportunity to compare the two. If not necessarily a fair two things to compare.<br />
<br />
Granted that while as I previously mentioned I didn't own and had never owned any Zeppelin CD's before, [6] I have heard plenty of their songs. As for Taylor Swift, I think I could count the number of her songs I'd previously heard on one hand and I probably couldn't name the title of a single one, save Blank Space. [7]<br />
<br />
So without further ado, after having twice listened to both CD's completely, a comparison of Led Zeppelin IV and Taylor Swift's Red.<br />
<br />
<b>1) Length:</b><br />
<br />
Zeppelin IV has eight tracks on it. Red has sixteen. Personally if I get a CD and it only has eight songs I usually feel kind of ripped off. [8] There are exceptions to the rule, Donald Fagan's Nightfly for example. Of course there are also CD's that have plenty more songs, but it's clear that the artist was scraping things off the sides of barrel to fill up the disc. So, I'd rather have a shorter disc of awesome songs, than a longer one of crap. Sixteen songs is on the other side of the spectrum. Too many songs and I've quit paying attention by the end. Surely not all sixteen of these are quality? <br />
<br />
In these instances both are exceptions to the rule. Zeppelin IV is eight songs and there is nothing you regret hearing. They could have put more, but the CD is enough. Red goes on for sixteen, but there is nothing you want taken out of the list. <br />
<br />
<b>The Winner: A tie.</b><br />
<br />
<b>2) Catchy-ness of songs: </b><br />
<br />
There is no denying that the Zeppelin songs have staying power. Of the eight songs, I already knew five of them by heart and I was at least familiar with one of the others (Battle of Evermore). Thus only two of them were relatively unfamiliar to me (Four Sticks, When the Levee Breaks).<br />
<br />
I don't think I'd ever heard a single song off of Red before.[9] Of course I don't typically listen to any radio station that would be playing Taylor Swift songs, so it's possible they are all played non-stop somewhere else on the dial. [10] There were several of the songs that I caught myself singing later (22, Stay Stay Stay, and Red at the minimum.) But that was immediately after listening to the disc and I haven't done it again since.<br />
<br />
<b>The Winner: Zeppelin</b><br />
<br />
<b>3) Replayability:</b><br />
<br />
Granted this is a lot like the previous topic, but it is not the same. Uncatchy songs would lead to low replayability, but catchy songs that don't go together, go on too long, or are too much the of the same [11] make CD's non-replayable as well.<br />
<br />
Zeppelin IV has decent replayability. Again since five of the eight songs are legitimate hits, even if you don't particularly like the other three, you need only wait a few minutes and you're back to a hit. However, the songs do all have a very similar feel to them. The same guitar sound that pretty much defines Zeppelin dominates all of the songs and let's face it Robert Plant pretty much sounds the same every time as well. [12]<br />
<br />
Red also has decent replayability. The CD is sixteen songs, but there is quite a range of styles and sounds. For instance, some of the CD sounds downright country. Others are clearly rock, pop or a kind of bluesy romantic. Swift also sings in a variety of styles. The result is a lot of variety that keeps the CD fresh sounding.<br />
<br />
<b>The Winner: Swift [13]</b><br />
<br />
<b>4) Topics of songs</b><br />
<br />
As previously stated my exposure to Taylor Swift is limited to these sixteen songs and a handful of others. So, perhaps this next statement isn't true, but it sure seems it to me.<br />
<br />
Here is a story line:<br />
<br />
A) Girl desires boy [14]<br />
B) Girl and boy start seeing each other<br />
C) It gets serious<br />
D) Everything is wonderful<br />
E) Conflict and tension arrises<br />
F) Things aren't going so good<br />
G)They either resolve things (go back to "D") or things fall apart (go on to "H")<br />
H) They break up<br />
I) Girl thinks back on relationship<br />
J) Go back to "A" [15]<br />
<br />
Every single Taylor Swift song follows this story line. EVERY SINGLE ONE. Granted some of them do not go through the entire story and may only focus on one, two or three parts of it. But they are all there. I know this is true for her Red album because I realized this halfway through the first listening and so on the second listening I identified where in the story line each song was.<br />
<br />
I'm not saying there is anything wrong with that, [16] and I'm sure there are people who really, really, really like focusing on that topic, but for me it gets kind of worn out.<br />
<br />
Zeppelin IV does not have this problem. Sure there are some songs here about girls. There is also a song that just about walking around the city and stuff happens (Misty Mountain Hop), a song about rock and roll and girls (Rock and Roll), a song about trying to buy your way into the afterlife (Stairway to Heaven) and a song about the battle between good and evil [17] (Battle of Evermore). If I have a complaint about the CD it's that there are times when the songs seem to lose their continuity. Honestly there are times when I think Plant no longer knows what he's talking about and is just filling space with lines that rhyme.<br />
<br />
<b>The Winner: Zeppelin IV by a long shot.</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>5) Cuteness of Artist</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
Have you looked at recent pictures of Plant? Even at their best the guys from Zeppelin are kind of shaggy, and unkempt. And I don't know why, but I suspect that they didn't necessarily smell so good either.<br />
<br />
Taylor Swift is gorgeous. There are sometimes where she has this slight oddness and angularity to her look that I can't quite put my finger on, but whatever. She's a hottie.<br />
<br />
<b>The Winner: Taylor Swift by a really really long shot.</b><br />
<br />
Doing a quick tally the verdict is 2.5 for Zeppelin IV and 2.5 for Taylor Swift's Red. Thus a tie and a need for a tie breaker category.<br />
<br />
Here it is:<br />
<br />
<b>Tie Breaker: If I was out of space on my iPhone which would I delete first to make space?</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
Taylor Swift's good looks notwithstanding, Red would get deleted without a second thought.<br />
<br />
<b>The Final Winner: Led Zeppelin IV</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b><br /></b>
<b>Led Zeppelin IV: A-</b><br />
<b>Taylor Swifts- Red: A-</b><br />
<br />
[1] - Except I've already lied to you as it is now a CD Warehouse and hasn't been Disc-Go-Round in years. I evidently have issues with change.<br />
[2] - The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars to be specific. Perhaps I have a problem with letting go of the past instead.<br />
[3] - This was one of those rare moments when I'm child free and suddenly find that I am free to browse and not focused on just keeping the Bean from destroying the universe.<br />
[4] - I know. I know. Please don't tell anyone. I've gotten past it now.<br />
[5] - Mostly stuff on the radio (NPR ftw), but also on other media types<br />
[6] - Unless the Encomium tribute album counts and it shouldn't. <br />
[7] - But only because it was the topic of one of the coincidental Taylor Swift occurrences that had occurred in the previous couple days.<br />
[8] - Counting Crows don't think I didn't note that your newest 11 track offering includes two demo versions of two of the songs, so really only has nine songs. You aren't fooling anyone.<br />
[9] - It's possible I heard 22 before, but I don't think I actually had. More likely is that I heard someone else singing snippets of it.<br />
[10] - But I doubt that.<br />
[11] - Any Boston CD for example.<br />
[12] - Changing volume level or speed doesn't count.<br />
[13] - But just barely.<br />
[14] - Typically one if not both of them are of the "bad girl" or "bad boy" variety<br />
[15] - Usually with a new boy<br />
[16] - Especially if you are a teenage high school or college girl who's life is surrounded by that kind of drama.<br />
[17] - And maybe a little Tolkein<br />
<br />
<br />
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B00M30SPMU&asins=B00M30SPMU&linkId=RNOXQTOICUGBWXUB&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B008XNZMOU&asins=B008XNZMOU&linkId=IHRO7TR6BDK6KXD3&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-80962089942337602592015-03-18T12:50:00.000-04:002015-03-18T12:50:05.490-04:00Cap’n Crunch’s Sprinkled Donut Crunch<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00NGXZ5L2/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B00NGXZ5L2&linkCode=as2&tag=misbgra-20&linkId=3OXA2YLQ2SW22HOS">Cap'n Crunch's Sprinkled Donut Crunch Cereal</a>:<img alt="" border="0" src="http://ir-na.amazon-adsystem.com/e/ir?t=misbgra-20&l=as2&o=1&a=B00NGXZ5L2" height="1" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important;" width="1" /><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There are several different varieties of Cap’n Crunch and to
be sure I’ve tried them all. Except for a brief, unrepeated stint in my early years, I’ve never
been a huge fan of the peanut butter flavor and I found the Chocolate Crunch to
be unappetizing, but all of the other varieties grace my bowl from time to time. [1]<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Given all of that, you might have thought that when I and
the family entered our local Target and saw the Cap’n’s newest offering I would have been eager with anticipation, but it wasn’t like that at all.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Somehow the idea of the already sugary sweet Cap’n Crunch
being combined with frosted donuts seemed to take things much too far. [2] <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The Pook wasn’t nearby while the Bear and I made our initial
opinions. As I’ve already said, I was
immediately a ‘no go’ on this one, but after gazing at the box the Bear looked
up at me and said, “Let’s get it!”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Using a time honored and proven strategy passed down from
generations, I immediately said, “Let’s see what mom says.” I was semi-sure that she would be as put off by
the whole thing as I was. However, when
she wheeled the Bean up to us in the red target buggy and saw giant display of the cereal in question she
immediately said, “Let’s get it!”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
That evening, though dinner had long past and breakfast was
but a distant memory, the Bear asked if he could have a snack. When told that he could, he asked if he could
have some of the new donut cereal.[3]
And thus we broke into the box.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The cereal is more akin to Quaker “Oh’s” than Cap’n Crunch. Each bit is shaped like a small donut and
they definitely lives up to their name and are very crunchy. In fact it is one of the few cereals that
benefits from sitting for a few seconds so that it can soak up some of the milk
and soften a bit.[4] <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There are in fact, tiny sprinkles on each of the rings,
though honestly I don’t know that they provide any real flavor to the
dish. They do have the unfortunate side
effect of coloring your milk. Usually I’m
all for colored milk, but because the sprinkles are a variety of colors the end
result is a kind of gray with a slight blue tint that does not look appetizing
at all. [5]<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And what about the flavor you ask?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Surprisingly they are downright tasty. The four of us ate over half of the box that
night eating the cereal dry right out of the box. It makes for a great snack when eaten that
way.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The next morning I had it for breakfast with milk and it is
equally tasty eaten in the traditional manner.
Again it strongly reminds me of “Oh’s” in its flavor as well has shape
and texture.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In fact, since it was on sale and tasted so good that the Pook went back to Target
that day and bought two more boxes.<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Cap’n Crunch’s
Sprinkled Donut Crunch: A-<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
[1] – To be completely honest, in recent years I have found
the Crunch Berries and Oops! All Berries to be too sugary sweet and thus I
pretty much only eat the regular Cap’n Crunch at this point.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
[2] – My stomach actually gave a little squirch of distaste
as I gazed at the purple box.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
[3] – Because cereal is by no means just for breakfast.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
[4] – As opposed to most cereals which are of the “eat fast
before it sogs” variety.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
[5] – Of course, I never drink the milk from regular Cap’n
Crunch either as it is so sugary sweet it promises an instant case of diabetes<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ss&ref=ss_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=misbgra-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B00NGXZ5L2&asins=B00NGXZ5L2&linkId=2VUDSJDK4446RDBD&show_border=true&link_opens_in_new_window=true" style="height: 240px; width: 120px;">
</iframe>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-14606067430470620962015-02-15T20:15:00.001-05:002015-02-15T20:15:20.965-05:00Minimum Wage<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">This post was prompted by a FB post from an old high school friend of mine and isn't something I normally spout on about, but for better or worse here goes.[1] </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b>Minimum Wage:</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Labor like all other goods and services is controlled by the interaction of Supply and Demand. In short the market demand for something is the ability and desire of everyone in the market to purchase that item at all prices and market supply is the ability and desire of all the businesses in the market to create/sell them at all prices. [2]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; text-align: center;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; text-align: center;">This is a simple graph of just that. [3]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-psF8cvbXuEY/VOEmNwp1xII/AAAAAAAAALk/hKzq8L-h_Mg/s1600/S%26D%2BGraph.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-psF8cvbXuEY/VOEmNwp1xII/AAAAAAAAALk/hKzq8L-h_Mg/s1600/S%26D%2BGraph.gif" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The place where the supply line and the demand line cross is called equilibrium. If you price a product at equilibrium price (P*) you will succeed in having an equilibrium quantity (Q*). </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This is awesome for several reasons. First because the quantity demanded by the consumers will be exactly the same as the quantity supplied by the producers. [4] Which means that at that price level every consumer who wants to purchase at that price level gets to do so and every items created by the suppliers at that price level gets sold. This is good because it means we aren't wasting resources and we don't have unhappy customers. But for the businesses this is extra good because it is also where profit is maximized. [5]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"Okay, Mr. B," you say, "but what does any of that have to do with minimum wage?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Hold your horses, I'm getting there.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Let me try to add one more concept, without drawing a lot of graphs and writing a lot of paragraphs. So to save time, put your finger on the graph above and pretend it is the price line.[6] Now move your finger up or down on the graph, but be sure to keep it horizontal. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">You should be able to see that at every other price, the price line will hit the supply and demand line at different locations. And thus at each of these locations either the resulting Quantity Supplied or Quantity Demanded will be greater than the other. This will result in either a surplus of a product if the price is above equilibrium or a shortage of a product if the price is below equilibrium [7].</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"Um, Mr. B, minimum wage?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Right, well it should come as no surprise that minimum wage works just the same way. Only because this is the labor market and not the product market we typically think of, the roles are switched around. Thus in the labor market the demand is not customers wanting to buy a product, but instead is businesses demanding employees to hire. And the supply is not businesses providing products for sale, but instead is people wanting to supply their work to the labor market. And finally the price line doesn't determine the price of a product but instead determines the wage that market should charge. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Of course there is going to be a different graph for every different market or job. So the equilibrium wage for a doctor is different than that of a plumber or a butcher or someone working the drive through at a burger joint. But if the market is left alone, the market will automatically find the equilibrium price or wage [8] and the market will be efficient and profit will be maximized [9]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This means that if the equilibrium wage for a doctor is $150,000 a year then that's what they will get paid and if the equilibrium wage for a butcher is $45,000/yr that is what they will get paid and if the equilibrium wage for a person working the drive through at a burger joint is $12,000/yr that is what they will get paid.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But then someone in the government says, "Hold on a second. You can't live on $12,000/yr. Let's make it illegal to sell your labor for less than $14,500/yr.[10] </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">When someone, in this case the government, says you can't sell something below a certain price, this is called a price floor. And price floors [11] always cause a surplus.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"Woohoo!" you say, "That means there are more jobs than people looking for them! Right?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Not so fast. Remember in the labor market the roles are switched and a surplus means the quantity supplied of people wanting a job will be larger than the number of employees demanded by businesses. So, what it means is that a lot of people are going to not be able to find the job they want.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Here's the graph you know you are wanting:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TNhWAkAjuPo/VOEylbsihKI/AAAAAAAAAL0/UsZSR3xJ-qo/s1600/Price%2BFloor.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TNhWAkAjuPo/VOEylbsihKI/AAAAAAAAAL0/UsZSR3xJ-qo/s1600/Price%2BFloor.gif" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Pf is the Price Floor. Qd is the quantity demanded and Qs is the quantity supplied. The distance between Qd and Qs is the amount of the surplus in the market. In other words it is the difference between the number of people who want to work at a given price for a given job and the number of jobs businesses are willing to fill at that same price. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But really that number is less important than the difference between Q* and Qd. Because that number is the number of jobs that will disappear because of the price floor or in this case because of the minimum wage.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"So, then if we raise the minimum wage to $10.10/hr how many people will lose their job?" you ask.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Good question. The answer is that nobody knows for sure. Looking around you can find a veritable mixed bag of answers from some people saying that nobody will lose their jobs to others estimating that around 1 million jobs will be lost. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I obviously don't know, but I do know that I have read articles about things like McDonald's in anticipation of a higher minimum wage creating test stores in which all of the food production is completely automated and thus cutting the number of employees that they would need to hire. I've seen stories about parks that fired all of their gate attendants and replaced them with automated ticket taking machines. And if you are old enough to remember when gas stations had someone who would fill up your gas and clean your windows for free and always wondered what happen to those jobs and who's to blame for them disappearing, you need look no further than minimum wage. So, I have to think there will be some impact.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Thus, in my mind strike one against the minimum wage is that it causes jobs to go away.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"Okay, we don't know how many, but do we know what kind of jobs will go away?" you ask.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">While we don't for sure what jobs will go and which ones won't, we can make some pretty good guesses. Just looking at the examples I gave above you can see that they are low skill jobs that offer low pay. They are jobs that aren't intended to be careers. They are jobs in short that are pretty much meant to be for high school teens looking for extra cash or for a place to get experience, a foot in the door as it were.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">So mostly the jobs that would disappear would mean more teenagers without jobs.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"But I know of several people who are working two minimum wage jobs just to try and stay alive," you say.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I agree that's a problem, but remember that we are currently coming out of the Great Recession and that the job market is not by any means back to where it should be. When the job market and the economy is working correctly the percentage of people making minimum wage is only around 3-5% of the workforce and the vast majority of those people are, as we've already said, teenagers.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">That's not surprising since as we said minimum wage is not meant to be a wage level that people earn for their career. It's an entry level position or a summer job for a teenager. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"So, if minimum wage goes up only teenagers will lose their jobs?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Or we could say that if we got rid of minimum wage it would mostly be teenagers who saw their wages go down.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"Get rid of minimum wage? If we did that business would just offer a tiny amount for their jobs."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Nope they wouldn't. Because it works both ways. If the business offers less than equilibrium they will be giving a price below equilibrium and as we already said that will just cause a shortage. In this case we would have a large quantity of businesses demanding employees at this low wage and a very small quantity of people willing to supply their labor at such a low price. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">If a burger business really did say that they were only going to offer $3.00/hr for the job of working at their drive through they would quickly find the only people willing to work there would be people who couldn't get jobs anywhere else because they were such horrible employees nobody offer a better wage was willing to hire them and the business would find their customers did really enjoy ordering from them and they would start to take their business elsewhere. In other words, the more a money a business offers the more people willing to work there and the better the pool of potential employees they have to choose from. Which means happier customers and more profits.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And I know this is true because in a normal economy only 3-5% of people are even making minimum wage. Thus most business already offer more than minimum wage. In part because their job may be more difficult, but also because they want to attract the best employee that they can afford.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Of course, I'm not saying that some jobs wouldn't lower their wages, but most wouldn't and I know most teenagers don't want to admit it, but I suspect if you asked and they were honest, most of them would admit that they could get by even if their job only paid $6.00/hr.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"What about the people who have minimum wage jobs and aren't teenagers? Lowering their pay rate might make it where they can't survive."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">True, but to me the solution there is that they need to get a better job and before you get irate and start shouting about people stuck in dead end jobs and lack of skills and no money for college, etc, etc, etc. Let me say that for those people the solution to me would be to help them get skills, training and school so that they can get out of those jobs and not to artificially inflate wages across the board.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">So strike two for minimum wage in my mind is that it really isn't helping the people we want it to help at all.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Finally, there's inflation.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I don't have the room to give a full rundown on inflation, but the gist is that over time the purchasing power of money can get eroded. Thus you may find that if you took $100 to the store today and bought a small pile of goods with it and then next year you went back to the same store and tried to buy the exact same pile of goods, you would find that you couldn't. Inflation would have made it to where the cost of those goods had risen. [12]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">There are a lot of things that can cause inflation but one of the major contributors is too much money in the market place. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">For instance let's pretend that all of the money in the country was only $1,000. And that in the market place the equilibrium price for bread was $1 per loaf. If we suddenly increased the amount of money in the marketplace to $2,000 what would happen?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Well since the price of bread was determined by the equilibrium price, if suddenly everyone had more money [13] we would suddenly see demand for products rise. In fact an increase in income is one of the things that determines that demand line we talked about way back at the first graph and as I just said an increase in income will cause an increase in demand. So what happens when you increase demand? Here's a graph that shows it: </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-JUHquLsMrmA/VOE8NLlWHNI/AAAAAAAAAME/9ESTpn3E_x0/s1600/Increase%2Bin%2BDemand.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-JUHquLsMrmA/VOE8NLlWHNI/AAAAAAAAAME/9ESTpn3E_x0/s1600/Increase%2Bin%2BDemand.gif" height="298" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Demand has shifted to the right (from D1 to D2) and prices have risen (from P1 to P2).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Thus giving everyone more money just means that they will drive the price of bread up. So, in our example, doubling the money supply from $1,000 to $2,000 will just cause the price of bread to double from $1 to $2. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Sure there will be a brief period in which people will have extra money in their pockets, but quickly they will find that prices have adjusted so that however much they could buy with their paychecks before the money supply doubled, that is exactly how much they would be able to buy after the money supply doubled.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This is no less true for minimum wage. But instead of doubling the amount of money in the money supply we are trying to artificially increase incomes with a different method, but the result will be the same. More money = more demand = higher prices. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">To add an additional problem from the other side of the coin, if we tell the burger joint that they have to increase their employees wages by x%, the burger joint will have to raise its prices to accomplish this and so will everyone other job that hires at minimum wage and this will have a ripple effect through society. So the prices of products will also rise because of this. [14]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Thus in my mind the third strike against minimum wage is that in the long run we aren't really even helping the few people who do get that pay raise, because in the end the increase in demand combined with the decrease in supply will mean that inflation will raise the prices for everyone. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Again, I'm not saying that there aren't people out there working minimum wage jobs that are struggling to survive and who desperately need to get paid more. What I am saying is that those people need new jobs, not an artificial increase in the wage of their old job. They don't need to stay in a low skill, low pay, minimum wage entry level job. They need to find a better career job that they can do and if there isn't such a job then they need to improve their skills set and situation so that those jobs are accessible. And if their situation is so bad that they can't afford to do that or they are unable to do that, then society, the government, or others need to act to help them so that they can.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">In summary, in my mind, raising minimum wage so that:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">a) jobs disappear</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">b) few of the people who really need it are actually helped by it; and</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">c) it causes prices across the board to rise and ultimately negate any minimum wage increase anyway</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">seems like a giant failure.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Minimum Wage: D+[15]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">[1] - Also, fair warning, this obviously involves a good bit of economics and is a pretty involved topic that I'm trying to handle in a short space and as such that means I'm not going to be able to go into as much depth as I'd like in some areas. However, if you want me to explain anything further, I'd be happy to.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">[2] - In regular English that means if I found out the total amount of CD's everyone in the market would be willing to buy at $5, $10, $15, $20 and every other possible price and I put all that in a graph, I would get the market demand for CD's. If I did the same thing at every price for people willing to sell/make CD's I would get market supply for CD's.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">[3] - In the interest of time and expediency I'm not going to go into depth on why Supply and Demand are drawn like that. Just trust me on this one.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">[4] - Quantity demanded is determined by where a particular price moving horizontally across the graph strike the Demand line. Quantity supplied is determined by where a particular price moving horizontally across the graph strikes the Supply line. At equilibrium those are the same place. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">[5] - And anyone who tells you that a business is in business for any reason other than making money and maximizing profits is probably selling you on something.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">[6] - If William Shatner shows up you're thinking of the wrong kind of price line.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">[7] - A surplus is bad because it means we've wasted resources and have extra products sitting around being unbought and a shortage is bad because it means that some customers are not getting to buy when they wanted to. But even more importantly the seller is not maximizing profit.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">[8] - Invisible hand ftw</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">[9] - Profit is maximized in the market, not necessarily in any one person's pocket.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">[10] - Which translates to roughly $7.25/hr and o</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">bviously minimum wage didn't start at $7.25/hr and if you want to find who really started minimum wage in the US, you can pretty much point that finger at FDR.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">[11] - That are set above equilibrium price</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">[12] - Historically the inflation rate in the US tends to be around 2-3% per year.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">[13] - Or even if a significant portion of the people had more money</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">[14] - This is called the Wage-Price spiral and to see the beginning of its effects without me drawing another graph, this is the opposite of the increase in demand. It is a decrease in supply. To see the effect put your finger on the graph over the supply line and then move it to the left. Note how the spot where the demand line and your finger cross moves up. An increase in prices.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">[15] - Minimum wage's heart is in the right place. So I didn't give it an "F".</span>Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-89268873055996677212014-11-08T17:33:00.001-05:002014-11-08T17:33:44.042-05:00High Five<b>The High Five:</b><br />
<br />
If the Internet is to be believed. [1] "Gimme five" or the "low five" has been popular since before WWII and is at least as old as the twenties. [2] <br />
<br />
It took until the 70's for it to morph into it's mentally deficient cousin the "high five".<br />
<br />
At the risk of giving away my feelings about this too early in this post, I can't stand high fives.<br />
<br />
Wikipedia lists several possible origins of this overhead hand slap. It seems the most likely [3] is Glenn Burke and Dusty Baker, who were both playing for the Dodgers back in 1977. In a moment of pure happiness after Baker hit his 30th home run and secured the Dodgers place in the play-offs, Burke ran over to the plate to meet Baker with his hand over his head. Baker, not knowing what else to do, reached up and slapped it with his own hand and thus this societal pain in the ass was born.<br />
<br />
If it wasn't Burke and Baker who were responsible, all of the other possible origin stories also involve sports. So whoever it was, we can at least be reasonably sure that the origin is sports related. Which makes sense and truth be told I would have been glad to see whoever it was that invented it, performing it that first time. Or during any other spontaneous celebration of a difficult victory.<br />
<br />
You see my problem with the high five isn't that the action is stupid or that it is inappropriate in and of itself. Instead my problem with it is two-fold. The first is that it is over-used and the second is that once someone puts up their hand, you are now socially obligated to reciprocate. <br />
<br />
To further elucidate [4]:<br />
<br />
Any import given to or from a high five, any real sense of meaning was long ago washed away by overuse. It is now akin to asking somebody, "How ya doing?" Which has been asked so many times, that the speaker doesn't really want or expect any answer longer than 'fine'. Which is okay with the person replying, because they don't want to give anything longer than that either. It's just an extended form of exchanging hi's. <br />
<br />
Similarly, the high five, which was created in a moment of spontaneous joy to celebrate a momentous occasion is now used to celebrate everything from unjamming a stapler to managing to open a door. In fact, I suspect you can think of someone who asks for a high five every time you see them.<br />
<br />
Gary [walking up to a group of friends]: Hey, what's up?<br />
Toolbag: It's Gary! High five!<br />
Gary: What exactly are we celebrating here? My ability to walk over here or just the simple fact of my existence?<br />
<br />
And while that's only semi-annoying, there are plenty of other similar examples of exchanges the have become so common place their real meaning/intent is lost. For instance saying "Bless you" when someone sneezes, wishing someone, "Have a nice day" when they leave and the previously discussed "How are you?" just to name a few. [5]<br />
<br />
What makes the high five more annoying is that it doesn't just require a short verbal response. Instead you must physically join in on the celebration of the workaday and you really don't have any choice. Because when presented with a raised palm and a verbal: "High five!" you cannot ignore it without causing yourself to look like the jerk.<br />
<br />
Chuck [the most annoying person you know and somebody you usually try to avoid seeing never mind touching at all costs]: Hey look, we have on matching socks! High five!<br />
You: We both have on plain white socks. If you look, you can see that they aren't even the same brand.<br />
Chuck: [hand still raised expectantly] . . .<br />
You: Sigh.<br />
<br />
Why must I be forced to participate in another's celebration of the mundane or inane? <br />
<br />
Did you just win the game for our team? Then I believe a celebratory display is in order. High fives, hugs, picking you up on our shoulders or something similar is not only okay, but is called for.<br />
<br />
Did you just pick a stray paper clip up off of the floor? Much like the hugs and parading you around on our shoulders is probably going a bit too far, perhaps it really isn't worth a high-five either?<br />
<br />
The ultimate problem is that some people just really, really love to get/give high fives. Is it that they are just so overflowing with joy that they feel compelled to share it? Or perhaps they are deprived of human contact? Maybe social interaction such a rarity for them that the momentary smack of palm on palm is an oasis in a desert. Maybe it's some sort of brainwashing.<br />
<br />
I think that from now on when I find myself on the receiving end of a high five request, I'll just hug the person instead. <br />
<br />
Or perhaps I should carry around a pocket full of confetti that I can throw to up the celebration one more notch into the absurd.<br />
<br />
Or it might be that I'm just a grump.<br />
<br />
<b>High-fives: D+</b><br />
<br />
[1] - And why wouldn't we believe the Interwebs?<br />
[2] - You can evidently see Al Jolson doing it in the <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0018037/" target="_blank">Jazz Singer</a>.<br />
[3] - Or at least the most commonly believed. And eventually what else matters?<br />
[4] - It's an SAT word. Go look it up. Fine, I'll look it up for you. <a href="http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/elucidate?s=t" target="_blank">Here</a>.<br />
[5] - It's not that there is anything wrong with these. But when you say, "Bless you" after someone sneezes do you really mean that you hope they receive some sort of blessing or are you just filling the space with the socially normed response?Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-44543008357148511412014-11-04T19:59:00.000-05:002014-11-04T19:59:13.484-05:00Spaghettle Noodies<b>Spaghettle Noodies:</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
I was picking up the boys after work today. Because it's election day, the Bear was out of Kindergarten and he got to spend the day with the lady who watches the Bean and used to watch him for day care. As we were getting ready to leave, the topic of dinner came up. I had previously mentioned making spaghetti a few days before and the Bear was trying to tell me that's what he wanted for dinner.<br />
<br />
In case I haven't mentioned it before, the Bear is incredibly articulate for a five year old. He has no problem speaking and the only words he regularly mispronounces are the ones that we haven't told him he's saying wrong because it's just too darn cute. [1]<br />
<br />
Only on this occasion his brain got kerfuttled [2] and he spoonerized [3] the words. Only it was one of those occasions where as you're speaking you know it's coming out wrong but you can't stop it and attempts to fix it just make it worse.<br />
<br />
If you want to hear someone else discussing it, go look up "Brian Regan take luck" on youtube. Or just click this <a href="https://www.google.com/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#q=brian%20regan%20take%20luck" target="_blank">link</a> [4].<br />
<br />
At any rate, despite the Bear's best efforts otherwise, all he could manage to say was "Spaghettle Noodies"[5] over and over again. He kept trying to say something else, with many false starts and stops, but to no avail. <br />
<br />
Having been the victim myself of such mental malfunctions many time in the past, I immediately started laughing. The Bear's old day-care Nana, could only make out what sounds like "Nudies" and simply stared at him. It was good times.<br />
<br />
Fast forward to us getting home and making dinner. The Pook is in full school play costume mode and is away slaving over a sewing machine, so it was just the men in the kitchen<br />
<br />
The Bear helped me make the spaghetti sauce [6] and then once the noodles were done it was time to eat.<br />
<br />
I don't know if you've ever eaten spaghetti with a two-year old and a five year old, but in case you haven't let me illuminate you as to a crucial fact or two.<br />
<br />
The possibility that the two year old will not end up with sauce on every part of his being is so remote as to be non-existent. The five year old has better odds, but they're still nothing you'd want to take to Vegas. Thus you'd better be prepared to clean up afterwards and if they are wearing any clothes you want to remain unstained with red sauce you'd better remove them prior to the event.[7] <br />
<br />
And thus it was that the Bean was promptly stripped down to his diaper and the Bear was told to take off his shirt.<br />
<br />
I sat down myself, but in the short span of time it had taken me to go from seating the Bean, to the counter to pick up my plate and back to the table, he'd already painted his portion of the town red. So, I promptly stood back up and took off my own shirt. [8]<br />
<br />
So there we three sat, happily munching on [9] our pasta.<br />
<br />
And as I looked around the table at our various states of undress, I thought:<br />
<br />
Spaghettle Noodies it is.<br />
<br />
<b>Spaghettle Noodies: A+</b><br />
<br />
[1] - Like Pretzel. He still calls them Prentzels and we're okay with that.<br />
[2] - Technical term<br />
[3] - An actual linguistic term, as opposed to kerfuttled.<br />
[4] - Any of the first two videos have the clip. But do yourself a favor and listen to the longer one, because Brian Regan is hilarious. Or if stand-up turned into a Coke ad is more your speed, click <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mzG2YQluCtA" target="_blank">this</a>.<br />
[5] - Prounced "Spag-ettle" and "New-dees"<br />
[6] - Yes, I make my own sauce. It doesn't take that long and it tastes way better than anything from a jar. If you ask nice, maybe I'll give you the recipe.<br />
[7] - In truth, the Bear likes his with no sauce and just butter and Parmesan cheese, but not surprisingly it doesn't really cut down on the mess that much.<br />
[8] - After all it's a fool that doesn't take his own advice.<br />
[9] - And in the Bean's case, wearing.Mr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4003225391932215087.post-22132436388794481282014-10-23T19:40:00.000-04:002014-10-23T19:40:27.637-04:00Temporary Insanity<b>Temporary Insanity:</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
You hear about people pleading temporary insanity from time to time. News reports of the events surrounding such crimes often start something like this: <br />
<br />
"Earlier this month a local woman [1] shot and killed five people while . . ."<br />
<br />
Of course, while you don't actually hear about the plead of temporary insanity until months and months later, you start to hear speculation about it long before.<br />
<br />
Bob: Hey, did you hear about that woman who killed all those people at Wal-Mart [2] last week?<br />
Charles: Yeah, I bet she pleads temporary insanity and gets away with it too.<br />
<br />
I suspect that that idea crosses the mind of most people when they hear about someone taking such a plea. Surely temporary insanity is just their way of trying to "get away" with something. Right? Because honestly, <i>temporary</i> insanity? You really want us to believe that you aren't normally crazy. It was just this one time?<br />
<br />
Officer Carl: You're under arrest for the murder of five people.<br />
Suspect: No no officer. You don't need to arrest me.<br />
Officer Carl: But you're crazy. You killed people. You're dangerous!<br />
Suspect: No, I'm over it now. See it was just "temporary" insanity.<br />
Officer Carl: Oh, well no problem then. Have a nice day!<br />
<br />
Well, what if I told you there was an experience that would let you see how temporary insanity is possible. It won't necessarily drive you actually crazy [3] but it will bring into stark contrast how even the most "sane" of us could lose it, if only for a short time.<br />
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And what is that experience you might ask? Well, I'll tell you. Here it is:<br />
<br />
Parenting.<br />
<br />
That's right parenting.<br />
<br />
Don't get me wrong. Being a parent [4] is wonderful. It's more awesome in more ways than you can fathom. However, there are days when your kids will just drive you insane. When the older child is crying with runners of snot coming down his face because he doesn't like the food that he ate just fine the night before. And then the younger one comes walking into the room carrying the next item in a procession of dangerous items that he seems to be able to summon out of thin air. [5] Of course, taking this item from him will cause him to break down into tears worse than his brother. Speaking of brother, the older one has decided to eat his food after all, but has someone managed to get it all over his face and stomach, as well as the majority of his side of the table. [6] Which in turn somehow causes the younger one to suddenly want the rest of his food, which he will now reach up onto the table for and spill everywhere on the floor. Which causes the older one to start crying again because this spill got a solitary drop of pears on his shoe. [7] And while you go to get a rag, the younger one sees the Halloween candy bag and begins saying "I want a lollipop" over and over and over and over and over. [8] Which causes the older one to declare that he's having candy for a snack. And when you inform him that that won't be true unless he finishes his food, starts the crying [9] going again. Meanwhile the younger one has suddenly discovered that the trash can is once a again a source of wonderful treasures and suddenly you realize . . .<br />
<br />
Temporary insanity. Yeah, I can see that.<br />
<br />
<b>Temporary insanity:</b> D-<br />
<br />
[1] - I'm not being sexist here, it could just as easily be a man.<br />
[2] - I've no specific reason to pick Wal-Mart, but honestly if you need a store to have someone suddenly kill a bunch of their fellow customers, I suspect many Wal-Mart shoppers could step up and do you proud.<br />
[3] - But it might.<br />
[4] - A father in my case, but having talked to the Pook, I can attest that it works the same for the mothers as well.<br />
[5] - Alternately it could be the next in a succession of extremely fragile and expensive things that he like wise seems to be able to summon out of thin air.<br />
[6] - Which you might expect from the two-year-old, but the big one is five now.<br />
[7] - Which evidently is sacred and must remain clean, unlike the front of his shirt.<br />
[8] - and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over.<br />
[9] - And the snotMr. Bhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08011505199546418944noreply@blogger.com0